Shakti Sutriasa
Experiencing Well-Being Part III

We’re already at the 3rd pillar of well-being!

As a quick review, the first two are:

1.Awareness

-Meaning, the ability to be more present, tuned into your here and now as well as to your mind chatter.

From Dr Davidson directly:

“Awareness: A heightened, flexible attentiveness to one’s environment and internal cues such as bodily sensations, thoughts, and feelings.

Skills: Mindfulness, attention, self-awareness”

Experiencing Well-Being Part III
Shakti Sutriasa
Cultivating Well-Being Part II

How is your practice of awareness coming along?

Another way to think about awareness, is mindfulness. If you google that word alone, you’ll find loads of practices (in addition to the pause one I gave you) to support you in cultivating more awareness.

Today we’re exploring the 2nd pillar of well-being that Dr Richard Davidson identified with his neuroscience research.

Cultivating Well-Being Part II
Shakti Sutriasa
Cultivating Well-Being Part I

Have you heard of a neuroscientist named Richard Davidson?

He’s been doing research on the brain specifically related to mindfulness, meditation, and well- being for decades. And his research is fascinating!

One of his key findings is around the idea of well-being. Through extensive study, trials and research, he has identified what he calls 4 pillars of well-being.

The really exciting news is that these so-called pillars aren’t inherent qualities, or even simply acquired knowledge. They are qualities that each and every one of us can cultivate and apply every day of our lives! Wahoo!

Cultivating Well-Being Part I
Shakti Sutriasa
3 Ways to Manage the Rate of Change in the World

Have you experienced the past few months as intense, chaotic, and full of uncertainty?

Yes?

You’re not alone.

Some days feel like a tough slog. Like we’re moving through dense resistance. Which is all the more reason to embrace your spiritual practice and deepen into it. 

Many seers have spoken of this time we are in as an amplification, when everything is speeding up and gaining power. This is exactly why you have to choose your own sanity, clarity and peace.

Not only because the chaos is ever growing, but because the benefit of you doing your inner work is amplified during this time. In other words, you can use this time to fast track your liberation.

3 Ways to Manage the Rate of Change in the World
Shakti Sutriasa
How to Know What Archetype You Embody

Recently, we explored the big idea in which I asked you what myth are you living. If you’re still ruminating on this, here’s another tool that might help you drill into it: archetypes.

The concept of archetype is something Carl Jung spent a tremendous amount of time exploring and is so rich! Caroline Myss has built on Jung’s work and expounded on how we can access and utilize archetypal energy to better understand ourselves and the world.

How to Know What Archetype You Embody
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It's All About Trust

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It's All About Trust

A few months ago, right around the New Year, I wrote about Robert Holden's idea of choosing one word to be your guide for the year. A word that you could contemplate, evaluate and ideally embrace this year, 2014.

My word is trust.

Four months into my exploration with this word, I have come to see its many manifestations in my life.

For one, I will confess to not being terribly trusting - of myself, of others, of the future. All of this lack of trust is from my past, from not feeling supported or nurtured, and from thinking the world is an unsafe place. I have worked on this for a decade but am determined to shed my lack of trust this year. And this resolution has gotten me thinking about all the ways it manifests in my life.

The Best Lesson I Ever Learned About Relationships

The Best Lesson I Ever Learned About Relationships

I've always been a romantic from the time I was a little girl. I bought it all, thinking that I'd be rescued from my unhappy situation, that somehow I'd meet the love of my dreams, and live happily ever after. As part of my fantasy, I was hooked on the idea of falling in love even though I don't know that I had any idea of what love actually was.

For years I harbored my romantic dream. My life's journey took me through many cities and some wonderful relationships. I have to admit, I have been pretty darn lucky!  But it wasn't until I was ready to give up entirely that I finally got it. My fantasy had finally popped and I was face to face with my own unhappiness and was now a single mother. I decided I was officially done with romance, done with relationships, done with love.

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4 Secrets to Being More Self Motivated

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4 Secrets to Being More Self Motivated

Last week I was talking to my 19 year-old about motivation. Why is it that certain people are motivated and others aren't? That some folks seem to walk through life stress-free while others wear it all over them? And that got me thinking.

When I was in my 20s, I needed extrinsic (outside of myself) means to keep me motivated. Partly because I was struggling with addiction issues and avoidance issues. I was easily stressed and lacked the confidence to get things done on my own. Work and school did that well, although not without stress and weight gain. I had to turn in my paper by Friday or be prepared for a dozen phone calls on September 12th. Deadlines helped keep me on track but I wasn't sure what to do with my stress and wasn't great at time management, often waiting until the last minute to get stuff done.

Lost and Found

Lost and Found

A few months ago one of my former high school students found me on Facebook. She still lives in Hong Kong these 20+ years later and last night we finally caught up. It was like time collapsed and we spoke as if resuming a conversation we'd been having the previous day.

I looked at her face over Skype, and she at me, she was exactly the same! She still had her innocence, sense of wonder and curiosity about the world. She went on to share what she'd been doing these past two decades and her words were balm to my soul.

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Wait, What? No Skiing?

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Wait, What? No Skiing?

I have been so lucky this past week. I've been on vacation with my family in Colorado, skiing. We love to come out in March because, typically, it's sunny and warm but there's still a solid base of snow. Normally, I'm up and out every day, maximizing my time and skiing until my legs hurt and I'm basically wasted for the rest of the night (and pass out around 9). But this trip has been different and today while the flurries fall from the sky, I am stuck inside with an awful head cold watching colorful skiers and snowboarders glide past my window.

No I did NOT just eat that entire box of cookies

No I did NOT just eat that entire box of cookies

Growing up I struggled constantly with my weight. I was the little fat girl, cute but chubby. In fact my father once told me, “you were fat from the time you were born.”

I ate because it was my way of nurturing and loving myself. But it was also my way of handling stress in my life and when stress got amped up, I blew up.

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Is the Answer Yes or No?

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Is the Answer Yes or No?

How many times in your day do you find that you say yes to life? Maybe you get invited to lunch with a friend or it's a beautiful day out, perfect for a walk on the beach. Is your response a resounding yes? I hope so. I know for me sometimes I say yes and sometimes I don't. And there may be a reason why I'm not saying yes. These are some of my personal selections. Do any of these sound familiar? "I don't have time. Today's my chore day. I have to work. Maybe another time." Or my absolute favorite, "I don't feel like it." (Usually this one is reserved for me and I come up with a more lofty excuse to say out loud.)

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Getting Beyond BUT

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Getting Beyond BUT

I don't know about you but there are some days when I don't feel like doing anything. I want to roll over and turn off my alarm clock, put the pillow back over my head and sleep. Then there are days when I actually do get up because I have to take my daughter to school and I have all the best intentions. I actually dress in my workout gear drive her to school only to come back home and, you can guess, climb back into bed. Don't get me wrong, I think it's great to have a day off, or even a mental health day, a day to do nothing or even a day to simply be unstructured. In this work obsessed culture, it's totally healthy and necessary. But what happens when the once in awhile turns into every day? Every day turns into week after week and suddenly your year is filled with - I don't want to... 

What, You Don't Want My Help?

What, You Don't Want My Help?

Growing up I definitely took on the role of peacemaker in my family, taking care of everyone's needs and reducing conflict. As I approached my early twenties, this morphed into wanting to save people (and the world). Somehow I was convinced that was my job. I could see other people's suffering so wasn't it my responsibility to rescue them - even if they didn't want to be rescued?

Be Mine Valentine?

Be Mine Valentine?

Happy Valentine's Day everyone! Today is the day we are supposed to express love and, ideally, receive love. So how's that going for you? 

Being a romantic, I have always loved Valentine's Day, or at least the idea of it. I have had my fair share of disappointing holidays and I am sure I am not alone. I remember in high school sending many roses and cards to boys I had crushes on without even getting a nod.

P is for Perseverance

P is for Perseverance

Last week I attended a training in San Diego. It was a certification for Neuro Emotional Technique (NET). This is a tool I use in psychotherapy that is a tremendous stress reliever for my clients. I first learned about the technique as an acupuncture patient since my practitioner also does it as part of her healing protocol. In fact, the technique was developed by a chiropractor, Dr. Scott Walker. Consequently, many chiropractors also utilize it.

Managing My Anxious Mind

Managing My Anxious Mind

I'm about to go on a trip which involves a training and certification. I decided to do this something like three years ago but really committed to this timeline about 10 months ago. So, I've known I'm going for awhile. But as the days get closer and the actuality of me boarding a plane and attending the seminar get nearer, my anxiety kicks into full gear. 

I watch as I get edgier and more short with my loved ones, less patient than I normally am. I notice how my body becomes restless and I wander around doing errands, distractedly. And I feel it in my chest, like a tightness. 

Allowing People to be Themselves

Allowing People to be Themselves

What happens when someone you love acts in a way that is disappointing, frustrating or (in your opinion) wrong? How to respond... This is something I have been struggling with lately. One way to respond is to judge his or her actions and make them wrong. This goes something like, "I can't believe you did that! How could you have been so (mean, thoughtless, self-centered)? This technique may feel good in the moment, allowing me to feel right or better than or maybe even righteous. Inevitably, though, this way never seems to help and in fact usually makes the problem worse.

Letting Go and Trusting

Letting Go and Trusting

Even though I created my goals for 2014, last week I decided to take up Robert Holden's suggestion and choose one word for my new year. One word to focus on and intend. One word to be my guide for 2014. The word that came to me was trust. When I think about trust, there are lots of ways to define and interpret it. For a long time, I have thought about relationships as truly being about trust. Because without it, how can you feel safe, allow yourself to be vulnerable or rely on another person? And as I delve into that idea that relationships are 'built on trust' then it is reasonable to extend that to life. If life is about relationships, then it is also about trust. 

The When Problem

The When Problem

It's so easy to get caught in the when dilemma. You know exactly what I mean. The when problem goes like:

"I'll be happy when I have a Mercedes."

"I'll be happy when I have a 4-bedroom house."

"My life will be good when I find the partner of my dreams."

"I'll be fulfilled when I have a better paying job."

"I'll feel content when I find a new teacher - she will give me the answers I seek."