Shakti Sutriasa
How to Really Change the World

You know that expression, “wherever you go, there you are.”?

I was thinking about that the other morning.

If you’re like me, you want to world to be a better place, more loving, peaceful, sane.

But what if the real way to succeed at changing the world isn’t by going out and tangibly changing the politics, or environment but is all about changing yourself? In other words, changing your mind about the world.

This is what I think the above quote actually means.

How to Really Change the World
Shakti Sutriasa
How Porous Are Your Boundaries?

Boundaries often get a bad rap, as if they’re not a good thing, as if they prevent us from genuine connection.

Is that really true?

First off, let’s define what we’re really talking about.

A boundary can be physical like a fence or a wall, even your skin is a natural physical boundary.

Boundaries can also be set by social or cultural standards. For example, in Japan, people greet one another with a bow, rather than in the United States where we often shake hands or hug.

Boundaries – in terms of dictating behavior- also differ in public versus private spaces, and vary depending on the types of relationship you have with someone.

How Porous Are Your Boundaries?
Shakti Sutriasa
Feel the Presence of God with You Always

When you were a child, did you have an imaginary friend? Someone you held tea parties with, read to in bed, played hide and seek with, or blamed for the mess in your room?

According to WebMD, around 65% of children under the age of seven have them, so if you did, you’re in the majority!

Naturally, there are social and emotional reasons that children have imaginary friends. It’s good company. It’s also a way to try out new social behaviors, or process feelings. An imaginary friend can offer support, too. After all, it’s YOUR special friend, someone who loves you, won’t leave, and doesn’t judge.

Feel the Presence of God with You Always
Shakti Sutriasa
The Key to Having a Lasting Romantic ...

February is the month for lovers, for love, for reminding us of what our hearts yearn for.

Are you like me? Have you always been a romantic, from the time you were little?

I completely bought into the fantasy. You know it, right? Get rescued from your unhappy situation when you meet the love of your dreams, and live happily ever after.

As part this, I was HOOKED on the idea of falling in love even though I had NO idea of what love actually was.

I harbored this romantic dream for years.

The Key to Having a Lasting Romantic Relationship
Shakti Sutriasa
The Tarot Card Influencing 2024

Last year my daughter turned me onto this idea that there is a Major Arcana Tarot card that informs the overarching energy of the year.

One way to think about this is as the TONE for the year on a global scale, reflecting the energy that might be arising.

It’s actually quite simple to learn which tarot card it is for the year. Simply add the numbers of the year together. So, for this year it would be: 2+0+2+4=8

The Card that correlates with the number 8 is STRENGTH.

Immediately that feels heartening, don’t you think? As if it is inviting us to call on our own inner strength, knowing that it’s there for us always. Perhaps it’s an opportunity to cultivate strength even more since we may need this quality as 2024 unfolds.

The Tarot Card Influencing 2024

psychotherapy vero beach

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Ready To Get What You Want?

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Ready To Get What You Want?

I can have the intention to learn how to ride a bike or to lose 20 pounds. I can think about it, visualize it and imagine it but unless I’m willing to take some action towards achieving my goal, it’ll never happen.

Am I going to learn to ride a bike from saying I want to? Not likely. But I’ll master it if I get on it and practice. It’s the same for losing weight. I can write down my intention or say it out loud but unless I do something, nothing will change.

I first heard Marci Shimoff talk about a secret formula for success in her book Happy for No Reason. In it she says she learned this from performance consultant, Bill Levacy. To me, it encapsulates exactly how to use intention and harness its power to create results in your life.

And the best part, it’s really easy to remember.

Here’s the formula: Intention, Attention, No Tension.

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The Power of Visualization

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The Power of Visualization

My 15 year-old daughter is taking a standardized test in English and as I think about preparing her for it, I’m reminded of an exam I took not so long ago. It was for Psychopathology, a required class for my graduate program in Social Work. We were essentially required to memorize the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM), read scenarios and apply diagnoses. 

All of us students were struggling. 

On the last day of class, we showed up on Saturday morning for our final. Before our professor passed out the exams she said, “I want you to close your eyes.”

 Being the dutiful student I am, I complied.

 She then went on. “Imagine yourself in a library. See the rows of books and all the information. This is what is within your brain. It has all the knowledge and answers. Allow yourself to access this, remembering it is here for you as you read each question and answer it.”

As I listened to her words, I saw myself in the library. I observed how my mind was made up of all this information, of the countless hours I’d spent studying notecards, discerning the differences between types of schizophrenia and personality disorders, between major depression and dysthymia, and on and on.

I took a deep breath acknowledging that all the answers would revel themselves to me. Then I opened my eyes and took the test.

 

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5 Ideas for Managing This Anxious World

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5 Ideas for Managing This Anxious World

Worried about the next snowstorm hitting your city or that your flight will be delayed? You’re not alone. In fact, every single one of us experiences anxiety. But when we constantly avoid socializing, excessively sweat before a presentation or are unable to sleep because our minds won’t stop, then anxiety may be taking us over.

According to the National Institute of Mental Health, 40 million Americans or 18% of our population is suffering from this level of anxiety making it the top mental illness diagnosis. Anxiety is clearly the malady of our modern day life.

What Exactly is Anxiety?

Anxiety, as I mentioned earlier, is a normal human response to uncertainty and we experience it often in our lives at work, in school (such as before tests), when we make decisions or if something unexpected arises.

Anxiety becomes a problem when our feelings and thoughts prevent action or cause symptoms that render us unable to cope. These include constant worry, panic, fear and apprehension. There can also be physical symptoms such as sweating, heart palpitations, high blood pressure, and restlessness.

Why Are We So Anxious?

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Is the Answer Yes or No?

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Is the Answer Yes or No?

How many times in your day do you find that you say yes to life? Maybe you get invited to lunch with a friend or it's a beautiful day out, perfect for a walk on the beach. Is your response a resounding yes? I hope so. I know for me sometimes I say yes and sometimes I don't. And there may be a reason why I'm not saying yes. These are some of my personal selections. Do any of these sound familiar? "I don't have time. Today's my chore day. I have to work. Maybe another time." Or my absolute favorite, "I don't feel like it." (Usually this one is reserved for me and I come up with a more lofty excuse to say out loud.)

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Getting Beyond BUT

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Getting Beyond BUT

I don't know about you but there are some days when I don't feel like doing anything. I want to roll over and turn off my alarm clock, put the pillow back over my head and sleep. Then there are days when I actually do get up because I have to take my daughter to school and I have all the best intentions. I actually dress in my workout gear drive her to school only to come back home and, you can guess, climb back into bed. Don't get me wrong, I think it's great to have a day off, or even a mental health day, a day to do nothing or even a day to simply be unstructured. In this work obsessed culture, it's totally healthy and necessary. But what happens when the once in awhile turns into every day? Every day turns into week after week and suddenly your year is filled with - I don't want to... 

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A Prisoner to Anger?

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A Prisoner to Anger?

Recently I found myself irritated and annoyed by someone in my life. I was struggling with acceptance and found myself aggravated and put out. My mind was on a circular track, like a broken record stuck in a groove, repeating over and over again, allowing me to wallow in my negativity. 

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A Life of The Mind? What About A Life of the Heart?

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A Life of The Mind? What About A Life of the Heart?

Growing up in New York City, I was surrounded by intellectuals and an analytical culture. Both my father and stepfather relished doing the Times crossword puzzles, looking forward to completing them daily (without Google). My father even undertook the Sunday diagram-less ones, sketching them out onto graph paper. He was stingy by nature but never scrimped when it came to learning. He'd pay for any course I wanted to take to "better myself." Meanwhile, my mother and stepfather spent every evening discussing politics and theatre. So naturally, as a teenager that's what I emulated. For "light reading" I chose novels like Sophie's Choice and The Sound and The Fury. In high school, I began reading about current events so I could sound knowledgeable but towards the end of my college years, I began to wonder about all of this critical analysis and the pursuit of a 'life of the mind.'

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You - The Only Relationship That Really Matters

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You - The Only Relationship That Really Matters

About a month or so ago, she and I'd been on the phone when she'd started crying telling me about the inner work she'd begun, trying to understand herself better and address her "issues." In the journal entry/email she'd forwarded to me, I could see her honesty right there on the page. She was indeed delving into areas of discomfort like self esteem, body image and negative habits.