Shakti Sutriasa
Cultivating Well-Being Part I

Have you heard of a neuroscientist named Richard Davidson?

He’s been doing research on the brain specifically related to mindfulness, meditation, and well- being for decades. And his research is fascinating!

One of his key findings is around the idea of well-being. Through extensive study, trials and research, he has identified what he calls 4 pillars of well-being.

The really exciting news is that these so-called pillars aren’t inherent qualities, or even simply acquired knowledge. They are qualities that each and every one of us can cultivate and apply every day of our lives! Wahoo!

Cultivating Well-Being Part I
Shakti Sutriasa
3 Ways to Manage the Rate of Change in the World

Have you experienced the past few months as intense, chaotic, and full of uncertainty?

Yes?

You’re not alone.

Some days feel like a tough slog. Like we’re moving through dense resistance. Which is all the more reason to embrace your spiritual practice and deepen into it. 

Many seers have spoken of this time we are in as an amplification, when everything is speeding up and gaining power. This is exactly why you have to choose your own sanity, clarity and peace.

Not only because the chaos is ever growing, but because the benefit of you doing your inner work is amplified during this time. In other words, you can use this time to fast track your liberation.

3 Ways to Manage the Rate of Change in the World
Shakti Sutriasa
How to Know What Archetype You Embody

Recently, we explored the big idea in which I asked you what myth are you living. If you’re still ruminating on this, here’s another tool that might help you drill into it: archetypes.

The concept of archetype is something Carl Jung spent a tremendous amount of time exploring and is so rich! Caroline Myss has built on Jung’s work and expounded on how we can access and utilize archetypal energy to better understand ourselves and the world.

How to Know What Archetype You Embody
Shakti Sutriasa
What Myth Are You Living?

A powerful way to help understand where you are on your life path, is to recognize what story or stories are playing out in your life. This is a question/idea that comes from Carl Jung. He famously said:

I was driven to ask myself in all seriousness: “What is the myth you are living?”

I found no answer to this question, and had to admit that I was not living with a myth, or even in a myth, but rather in an uncertain cloud
of theoretical possibilities which I was beginning to regard with increasing distrust.

What Myth Are You Living?
Shakti Sutriasa
Step Confidently into 2025

Happy New Year!

Are you ready for 2025?

It still feels pretty new, which is why it’s helpful to employ some anchoring exercises to support you as you get clear about how you want this year to be for you. 

I always start my year by choosing a word or phrase, something to focus on, dive into, and act as a theme or inquiry for the upcoming 365 days.

Some of the ones I’ve chosen in past years include: receive, relax, joy, shine, communion… you get the idea. Once you hit on your word (or phrase), the invitation is to spend the next 12 months deepening into how you can experience it in your life.

Step Confidently into 2025

What My 'Ready or Not' Baby Taught Me

What My 'Ready or Not' Baby Taught Me

When I was twenty-six, I discovered, quite to my surprise, that I was pregnant.

I panicked because I was not ready to have a baby.

I’d only been married three short months. My new husband and I were still getting to know one another. Were we, as a couple, prepared for a child?

And I certainly didn’t know enough about anything – life, parenting, culture... There was so much more I needed to learn before I could be a mom, wasn’t there? 

After spending a few weeks in denial, I quickly moved into anger. How could I have been so stupid? What was I thinking?

Time to Stop Struggling

Time to Stop Struggling

Ever have one of those days when you just hit the wall? When your efforts create no results and nothing seems to work?

Days like that are frustrating, tiring and, frankly, discouraging.

The good news is that tomorrow you get to start again, fresh.

And what if tomorrow you embraced a new idea, a new way of looking at life? One that felt more invigorating and enlivening. A perspective that was less about doing and more about receiving.

I recently had an a-ha about this when I saw a post on Facebook. It was an image of a woman floating effortlessly in the water and said:

When I stop struggling, I float.

Get Your Creativity Flowing

Get Your Creativity Flowing

Have you ever wanted to paint, throw a pot or play an instrument?

Turns out that you aren’t alone. More than ever, Americans are enhancing their every day lives by incorporating some kind of creative outlet. Whether it’s painting a plate on date night or joining a weekly Bollywood dance class, we’re choosing to spend more of our time in creative pursuit.

This is great news and here’s why:

No Excuses!

No Excuses!

Last week I was super lucky! I listened to a talk by business coach, Amanda Moxley. One of my big takeaways from her hour-long webinar was this:

We have to take 100% responsibility for our lives. For what we do AND what we don’t do.

Hmmmmm.

I remember that word, responsibility.

It was the agreement I made with myself when I left my spiritual teacher in 2004, when I agreed that I would be in charge of my life – good and bad. That whatever happened, I would own it.

Had I forgotten or was I now at a new level?

Embracing Your Process: The Good, The Bad & The Ugly

Embracing Your Process: The Good, The Bad & The Ugly

Can you relate?

Things are going exactly according to plan and you are clearly in charge of your life. But then- all of a sudden- life takes charge and is controlling the wheel of your destiny.

When that happens, tasks take forever to complete. No one calls you back. Or maybe you think things will go a specific way just to get entirely rerouted.

When life seems to be in charge - it can trigger uncertainty or the internal skeptic- and make us feel unsure or cloudy.

We wonder things like:

  • Is this really the right direction?
  •  Am I doing what’s in my best good?
  • Is this moving my career/life forward?

Here’s the good news, if it’s happening then it’s exactly what you need.

Being Okay With Change

Being Okay With Change

Change is everywhere, whether we recognize it or not.

Day turns into night, flowers bloom and wither, stocks rise and fall. We move houses, change jobs, meet new people, and shift our mindsets.

Change is a natural part of life but sometimes, especially in our intimate relationships, change can be a challenge.

Part of what makes change difficult is that most of us prefer certainty.

We want to know that there is routine, that things will stay the same. That my assistant will be at work on time, that the bus will stop at the corner at 8:30 every morning, that Safeway always carries the deodorant I prefer.

Consistency gives us a sense of stability, of reassurance.

Just as we have our coffee every morning, we come to expect people to be the same day after day, too, and when they shift, that can upset out status quo.

So the question then is, how do we give each other space to change?

Connecting to Your Inner Truth

Connecting to Your Inner Truth

A question I hear a lot from clients is how do I know what to do?

How do I know what action to take? Where to live? How to follow my passion?

Whether you’re just about to graduate from college, a millennial rethinking your career path or in your 50s looking at being an empty nester, the answer is the same.

We have to turn within and listen to our inner guidance.

This can be hard because it often seems like there are multiple people speaking to us all day long. It isn’t just one clear voice guiding us.

If we stop and really listen to the voices in our heads, we can begin to identify them.

This is a really useful tool. Because it can help us distinguish which aspect of ourselves we might be listening to or activating.

For example, one of the voices that speaks to me is the voice of fear.

What My Anxiety Taught Me About Love

What My Anxiety Taught Me About Love

It’s never easy when you come up against your ego.

Or to be more specific, when your shadow behavior is pointed out to you by someone you love and trust.

Recently I had a conversation with my husband in which he shared that over the past year I’d demonstrated more controlling behavior. He gave a few specific examples, some I agreed with and others I wanted to immediately reject.

My insides squirmed listening to him.

I just wanted him to stop, to go away and leave me alone.

Didn’t he understand anything?

It wasn’t that I was being more controlling it was that I was finally coming in to my own, doing what I wanted as opposed to what other people were telling me to do.

I felt hurt and rejected. Because that’s the only way an ego can feel.

My husband was infinitely kind, loving and soft when he spoke to me but what I heard was, “You’re a controllingbit** and I don’t want to be with you.”

My ego had been bruised. I felt raw, almost like a frightened little child.

Where Is Your Soul Sister?

Where Is Your Soul Sister?

Have you ever had the experience of meeting someone and, after a brief period of time, it’s as if you’ve always known them?

Or perhaps you have a good friend you haven’t seen in years (or decades) and as soon as you’re together, it’s like no time has passed?

Don’t you love when that happens?

I have a soul sister like that and I’ll call her Natalie.

Last year I stayed in a town just a few hours from where she lives. I hadn’t talked to her in awhile but we’d stayed in touch on Facebook. I messaged her letting her know I was nearby.

Natalie immediately called and said she was on her way to this very same town as her daughter was participating in a state event!

Meant to be?

I was a little nervous to see her again. Even though we’d reconnected via social media and the phone in the last few years, I hadn’t seen her or physically been with her in almost 20 years.

The last time we were together, we’d had a falling out.

Maybe it was disappointment at some of my life choices or that I’d backed out of a plan we’d made together. Either way, I felt stifled and judged and in need of some space and time. I’d relocated, moving a thousand miles away, so it became easy to stop communicating with her.

And, as often happens in life, I got busy and left her behind to drift out of my life.

Wherever You Go, There You Are

Wherever You Go, There You Are

I used to think that if I could just move somewhere else, everything would be better.

And believe me, I sure tried.

On average, I lived in a place for four years although sometimes my stays could be as short as a few months. I bounced around for years until I had my first child. Then, one of my friends finally scolded me. “You can’t keep moving, it’s bad for the baby.”

At first I ignored her. Infants cling to primary support not place but her words rang in my ears and I finally had to stop running.

Because that’s what I was doing. Running away from me.

I was convinced that each new place was the answer to my unhappiness. It wasn’t that the dissatisfaction was within me, NO! It was the pollution, the traffic, the unaware people, the lack of opportunities.

God forbid I actually take a look within.

I exchanged traffic for trees, noisy neighbors for none but I still always brought my emotional baggage with me; my procrastination, unresolved issues or negativity because, they were all a part of who I am.

I finally stopped long enough to look inside and began the work of healing.

Within and Without

Within and Without

Have you heard this before?

Your inner world creates your outer world. 

I interpret this to mean that what I feel, how I view my life and process it affects me more than where I physically am, or what I am actually doing.

Kind of like attitude is everything.

A few years ago I was skiing in Colorado. It was a cloudless, sunny day in the high 40s, the snow conditions were perfect and I was surrounded by my loved ones.

But as I rode up the chair lift looking out at the forest of frosted fir trees and mountains, I felt terrible. Inside of me was like a gray, gloomy day. I was in a funk.

Maybe it was the stark contrast that I was experiencing in that moment- between being in such a gorgeous place and feeling so dark inside- but something finally clicked.

I saw vividly how my inner world was clouding over and coloring my outer world.

Are You Willing?

Are You Willing?

I have a good friend named Robin who’s a Unity minister. She’s a dynamic speaker and a riveting storyteller. Reverend Robin has a knack for tying metaphysical concepts with everyday reality and infusing them with heart and humor.

One of her sermons -that really stuck with me- was a story in which she likened life to a game.

So, play with me here for a minute.

Imagine if you will, that life really is a game.

We choose our player and then embark onto the board.

Sometimes we get a good break (we skip three spaces) and sometimes we have to go backward (or worse to jail!)

Maybe we meet a partner, have a child, get divorced, buy a house or a car, lose a job, go back to school, fall into bankruptcy, get sick, need hospitalization…

But inevitably, whatever new adventure life throws at us, we have to continue playing.

We can’t give up.

The phrase Reverend Robin kept repeating was, “nevertheless, I am willing.”

  • Willing to play
  • Willing to move ahead
  • Willing to get through the adversity
  • Willing to open up to life
  • Willing to embrace change
  • Willing to invite in miracles

When we think about life as a game it:

What My Dying Sister Taught Me About Courage

What My Dying Sister Taught Me About Courage

June 30 marks the 5th anniversary of my younger sister, Melissa’s, death from metastasized breast cancer. Almost as soon as June begins I think of her constantly. And in these past few weeks, I’ve been reflecting on what she taught me, particularly about courage.

It’s one of life’s ironies that Melissa and I looked so much alike but in many ways couldn’t have been more different.

As a child, I was self-deprecating and acted as the family peacemaker while Melissa was the rebel, the one who was so clearly out of the box. A born risk-taker, she was always more daring than I was.

I remember the first time we went skiing. I was about nine.

My Dad had successfully maneuvered us up the chairlift and onto the bunny slope. He was busy adjusting my binding when he looked up, glanced around and then turned to me. “Where’s your sister?”

She was already down the hill!

And she kept living like that.

At 18, she went skydiving, at 20 biked alone across the Netherlands and France and at 22 moved to Cairo. She was her own person and was a great teacher for me about living courageously.

Here are just a few of the lessons she taught me:

Optimist? Pessimist? Try Realist

Optimist? Pessimist? Try Realist

No doubt at some point in your life, you’ve been asked if the glass is half empty or half full. Invariably, the answer to that question implies that you’re either an optimist or a pessimist. Right?

But is there another way to see?

To out myself, I confess that I’m naturally inclined towards optimism. This is a bit surprising considering that I was raised in a house full of pessimists.

My parents wanted proof, evidence of why things existed, of how it would work out. Their view was that life was difficult, painful and my job was to suck it up and got on with things.

Maybe it’s because I have difficulty with duality and its need for binary opposites but somewhere in my 20s, I decided that I didn’t really like either of those definitions.

There had to be another option, something that combined both viewpoints.

Optimists often get a bad rap and that’s happened to me plenty in life.

You get called an optimist and really it’s a more polite way of saying you’re unrealistic, a Pollyanna or simply out of touch.  But healthy optimism is also about seeing the possibilities of the future and about being hopeful and excited about what can be.

Pessimists certainly have the market cornered on successful arguing and banter.

Most intellectuals I know fall into this category. It’s smart and savvy to analyze and pick things apart, exposing the flaws.

Some pessimists though fall into the category of fatalists. These are the Debbie Downers who never see anything good, always say life is bleak and meaningless and can be draining to be around for any period of time.

What’s the third way?

Living Stress Free: 7 Habits for a Life Filled with Peace & Joy

Living Stress Free: 7 Habits for a Life Filled with Peace & Joy

Feeling stressed?

You’re not alone!

Most everyone struggles with managing life in this highly connected, 24/7 world. And, if you’re anything like me, you may have never learned healthy coping skills for stress.

Over the years, I’ve learned to incorporate these seven habits. Since then, my life works better, I’m less crazed and more productive.

So instead of coming home and drinking a 6-pack of beer, or vegging out in front of the TV, consider incorporating some of these into your life.

1.     Breathing

My #1 rule to live by is breathing.

Of course you breathe all the time (or you’d be dead!) But when you can focus on your breath – and take a few nice, deep breaths, it will instantly transform your moment. Suddenly you’ll feel more expansive. Breathing with awareness slows down the whirling thoughts and offers room for clarity.

Breathing always comes before I make any shifts or changes.

I stop, breathe and then take action.

2.     Visualize It

I believe that the Universe is always supporting us and providing us with what we need. Unfortunately, we’re often unclear about what we DO want or are accidentally giving the Universe messages of things we don’t want.

We constantly telegraph our desires – consciously and unconsciously- to the Universe with our thoughts, intentions, imagery and words.

When you find yourself in a stressful situation, pause for a moment and visualize the outcome you actually want.

  • Is it to have plenty of time to get your tasks done?
  • Maybe there’s a grievance that needs to be resolved easily and effortlessly – picture that.
  • Perhaps you want a specific outcome. Instead of thinking about what you don’t want to happen, try seeing what you do want – as if it’s already done.