Recently, we explored the big idea in which I asked you what myth are you living. If you’re still ruminating on this, here’s another tool that might help you drill into it: archetypes.
The concept of archetype is something Carl Jung spent a tremendous amount of time exploring and is so rich! Caroline Myss has built on Jung’s work and expounded on how we can access and utilize archetypal energy to better understand ourselves and the world.
A powerful way to help understand where you are on your life path, is to recognize what story or stories are playing out in your life. This is a question/idea that comes from Carl Jung. He famously said:
I was driven to ask myself in all seriousness: “What is the myth you are living?”
I found no answer to this question, and had to admit that I was not living with a myth, or even in a myth, but rather in an uncertain cloud
of theoretical possibilities which I was beginning to regard with increasing distrust.
Happy New Year!
Are you ready for 2025?
It still feels pretty new, which is why it’s helpful to employ some anchoring exercises to support you as you get clear about how you want this year to be for you.
I always start my year by choosing a word or phrase, something to focus on, dive into, and act as a theme or inquiry for the upcoming 365 days.
Some of the ones I’ve chosen in past years include: receive, relax, joy, shine, communion… you get the idea. Once you hit on your word (or phrase), the invitation is to spend the next 12 months deepening into how you can experience it in your life.
I love sharing spiritual tools with you with this blog.
Sometimes it's a poem, mantra, prayer, breath exercise, or affirmation. But each technique is one I’ve tried and tested over the decades and is now part of my box of go-tos. The ones I rely on when I need additional support, assistance or help reconnecting to the truth of myself, which is love.
Today I felt called to share one that I return to again and again. It's a breath I was taught by my guru over twenty years ago called the Chittakash, which is the heart space over the head.
The other day I saw this quote by Stephen Covey:
“The biggest communication problem is we do not listen to understand. We listen to reply.”
I’ve always considered myself a good listener, how about you?
I enjoy paying attention to what others say, but it’s definitely a different kind of listening when we truly want to understand what someone else is saying!
And despite thinking I was good at this particular skill, I got a whole new perspective a few years ago when I received training from a facilitator who was part of the Compassionate Listening Project
The physical body truly remarkable.
And the more we learn about it, the more we see how interconnected our physical body is to our emotional well being.
Thanks to neuroscience, we now know that the body stores stress, memories, and trauma.
In part because the physical body is always present!
Whether you’re watching a movie or sleeping, working on the computer or making a speech – regardless of where your attention is, your body is present in that physical space.
It’s like the silent witness.
Feel like you don’t belong in your family? In society? In the world?
Me too.
I used to think it was just me. That something was terribly wrong with me. I was flawed, broken because I felt disconnected. Everyone around me seemed content, loved, successful. They were all normal and happy. Why wasn’t I?
Then I convinced myself that there must be a place, an actual physical place, where I could feel all of that- where I genuinely belonged.
So I went looking. First I crossed the country, from Boston to Portland. Then I went to Asia- Hong Kong, Singapore, Malaysia. I even tried the Middle East and Europe.
I thought I’d found it in Bali, but no…
It took fifteen long years for me to clue in.
I’m a big fan of Brené Brown because she’s willing to research topics that no one wants to talk about, like shame. One of my favorite books of hers is Daring Greatly.
We all have shame, those places inside where we feel bad about ourselves, unworthy, embarrassed, ashamed.
One of the first times this happened, was when I lived in Hong Kong. I was in my early twenties, struggling to find my way as an adult, and living 10,000 miles away from my family, friends and culture.
I admit it, I was lonely and scared.
I watched a video over the weekend that a college student posted on YouTube. As she explains, she did a little social experiment in which she called different young men and women ‘beautiful.’
Seeing their faces transform at her words, I was reminded of the same thing happening to me not so long ago.
From the time I can remember, I struggled with being overweight. My parents were always on my case about what I ate, how much I weighed and, being sensitive, even a drop of criticism was too much for me.
Or to be more specific, when your shadow behavior is pointed out to you by someone you love and trust.
Recently I had a conversation with my husband in which he shared that over the past year I’d demonstrated more controlling behavior. He gave a few specific examples, some I agreed with and others I wanted to immediately reject.
It wasn’t that I was being more controlling it was that I was finally coming in to my own, doing what I wanted as opposed to what other people were telling me to do.
My husband was infinitely kind, loving and soft when he spoke to me but what I heard was, “You’re a controllingbit** and I don’t want to be with you.”
My friend Heidi posted a link to a Huffington Post article, My “Naked” Truth yesterday. It's Robin Korth’s account of dating a man who enjoyed her “head and heart” but not her body.
After reading the piece, I found that I couldn't stop thinking about it.
Probably two of the most painful culprits in the emotional arsenal are guilt and shame. These two can seriously wreak havoc on us. It wasn’t until I read Brené Brown's work that I fully understand the difference between them AND how to let go of one and positively utilize the other.
Guilt is the feeling we have when we know we’ve done something wrong or hurt another. We feel bad about our actions. Perhaps I yelled at my daughter in an unkind way or I forgot to leave a tip for the waiter. My action results in me feeling guilty.
Growing up in a family where conditional love reigned, it was easy to never feel good enough. My job was to be perfect and then I’d receive love. My sister was the "problem child" so consequently, the message I got was that I wasn't allowed to be in need, melting down or falling apart. I had to be together so I became a master at pretending I was while underneath felt totally insecure and inadequate.
Happy Valentine's Day everyone! Today is the day we are supposed to express love and, ideally, receive love. So how's that going for you?
Being a romantic, I have always loved Valentine's Day, or at least the idea of it. I have had my fair share of disappointing holidays and I am sure I am not alone. I remember in high school sending many roses and cards to boys I had crushes on without even getting a nod.
