You know that expression, “wherever you go, there you are.”?
I was thinking about that the other morning.
If you’re like me, you want to world to be a better place, more loving, peaceful, sane.
But what if the real way to succeed at changing the world isn’t by going out and tangibly changing the politics, or environment but is all about changing yourself? In other words, changing your mind about the world.
This is what I think the above quote actually means.
Boundaries often get a bad rap, as if they’re not a good thing, as if they prevent us from genuine connection.
Is that really true?
First off, let’s define what we’re really talking about.
A boundary can be physical like a fence or a wall, even your skin is a natural physical boundary.
Boundaries can also be set by social or cultural standards. For example, in Japan, people greet one another with a bow, rather than in the United States where we often shake hands or hug.
Boundaries – in terms of dictating behavior- also differ in public versus private spaces, and vary depending on the types of relationship you have with someone.
When you were a child, did you have an imaginary friend? Someone you held tea parties with, read to in bed, played hide and seek with, or blamed for the mess in your room?
According to WebMD, around 65% of children under the age of seven have them, so if you did, you’re in the majority!
Naturally, there are social and emotional reasons that children have imaginary friends. It’s good company. It’s also a way to try out new social behaviors, or process feelings. An imaginary friend can offer support, too. After all, it’s YOUR special friend, someone who loves you, won’t leave, and doesn’t judge.
February is the month for lovers, for love, for reminding us of what our hearts yearn for.
Are you like me? Have you always been a romantic, from the time you were little?
I completely bought into the fantasy. You know it, right? Get rescued from your unhappy situation when you meet the love of your dreams, and live happily ever after.
As part this, I was HOOKED on the idea of falling in love even though I had NO idea of what love actually was.
I harbored this romantic dream for years.
Last year my daughter turned me onto this idea that there is a Major Arcana Tarot card that informs the overarching energy of the year.
One way to think about this is as the TONE for the year on a global scale, reflecting the energy that might be arising.
It’s actually quite simple to learn which tarot card it is for the year. Simply add the numbers of the year together. So, for this year it would be: 2+0+2+4=8
The Card that correlates with the number 8 is STRENGTH.
Immediately that feels heartening, don’t you think? As if it is inviting us to call on our own inner strength, knowing that it’s there for us always. Perhaps it’s an opportunity to cultivate strength even more since we may need this quality as 2024 unfolds.
The physical body truly remarkable.
And the more we learn about it, the more we see how interconnected our physical body is to our emotional well being.
Thanks to neuroscience, we now know that the body stores stress, memories, and trauma.
In part because the physical body is always present!
Whether you’re watching a movie or sleeping, working on the computer or making a speech – regardless of where your attention is, your body is present in that physical space.
It’s like the silent witness.
The other day I was talking to a young woman who’s been living in the city for a while. On a work trip recently she visited a sleepy town surrounded by national forest. While there, she realized the city was no longer feeding her.
More and more I hear that. And it echoes my own experiences.
I crave nature- trees, water, silence.
How about you?
When people are asked what they want in their lives, it’s always more happiness.
So then why aren’t we as a society happier?
According to research, happiness levels in industrialized countries have stagnated since the 1950s and are now actually declining.
And it isn’t about needing more stuff, earning more money or having a bigger house.
As many of you know, I’ve been actively studying happiness since 2011 when I became a certified happiness coach. Since then, I’ve taught workshops on happiness as well as continued to dive into the practice of daily happiness on a deeper level in my life.
If the first 3 questions resonated with you, you’re likely more of a routine person. Meaning that you like life to be consistent, regular. You do your best work when things are humming along and you are in your flow.
If, instead, the latter 3 seemed more fun and fitting to your personality, you’re likely to be more goal oriented.
Sometimes the news feels like too much.
I wouldn’t blame you if you just wanted to stick your head in the sand, or in a pint of ice cream and check out by binge watching Game of Thrones.
I used to do that all the time.
As soon as the anxiety would flutter into me, I’d run straight to the cupboard and eat my way into not feeling it anymore.
I was 15 years old the first time I consciously felt anxiety and had just started my sophomore year at a new boarding school. The souring in my stomach and the fear that blinded me was terrifying. So I bolted down the stairs of my dorm, and headed straight to the vending machines. I wanted to push away and bury all that anxiety and uncertainty.
By October, I’d gained twenty pounds because I didn’t know how to deal with dark emotions like: discomfort, anxiety, pain, anguish, frustration, resentment…
It took me 10 years to learn how to be present and experience these uncomfortable feelings.
Now when they come up, do I like it? Not really.
The other morning I turned the page for my new lesson in A Course in Miracles (ACIM) and here is what it said; “I am entitled to miracles.”
I smiled.
First because I love that idea, and second because it felt so timely, given that Christmas and Chanukah are right around the corner.
I’ve always been fascinated with miracles, magic and what seemed like “other-worldly stuff.” To me, miracles were the foray of Gods, of holy people, of wonder. They weren’t something that a mere mortal such as myself could perform.
Until I learned more - that we, you and I, co-create our world with God.
We’re entering into the vortex of holiday. The next 5 weeks will be a blur of excitement… and stress.
Many of us look forward to the holidays as a time for family, fun, sharing and giving. But the holidays are THE most stressful time of year.
So in the midst of decorating, shopping, cooking and partying, be sure to take extra special care of YOU.
Life is filled with the unknown. Whether it’s a presidential election, a storm prediction, a doctor’s appointment or the stock market.
Think about it. Whenever you try something new – a dance class, a restaurant, lunch with a new friend, a job opportunity – there’s risk. Simply because it is new, unknown or uncertain.
So, how do we, as students of spirituality learn to embrace that which is unknown and not fall into fear?
When we decide to make a shift in our lives – be it a new job, relationship or home- there’s first the decision and then the doing.
A new job, relationship or home?
Once you decide, things start to fall in place, a To-Do list or path becomes clear.
And yet, as you move closer to the actual shift, the change itself, new resistance and difficulties arise.
For many of us, this was the first week back to work-school-life-as-usual after the holidays as well as the first week of the New Year. Happy New Year!
Maybe you’re like me, and want to eagerly jump back into life.
But before you leap back into the craziness and chaos of your wonderful life, do yourself a favor and stop.
Lately I’ve been doing inventory.
I’ve been reflecting on my life and examining it by asking this question: Did I make a significant decision according to a set of rules, some kind of pre-ordained/ family inspired plan or because it was truly and deeply something that I wanted to do for my own self growth?
Take a moment to look back at your life and ask yourself the same question.
Turns out that we make a lot of decisions based on: pleasing others, fulfilling expectations, because it’s the right thing to do or is what we’re “supposed” to do.
Ouch.
I just got back from a 3-day business workshop that was designed to help women entrepreneurs break through success and money barriers. It was informative, emotional and healing but it was also a bit of a marathon, going from early in the morning until late into the night.
I enjoy these kinds of events especially because I’m committed to my personal development and self-growth. I love to immerse myself in new ways of thinking, bond with other women and meet fellow entrepreneurs. I find the experiences to be fulfilling and inspiring but then I have to come home.
I love being an American but one thing that’s been vexing me lately is how work and career have taken over our lives. It’s as if we are no longer human beings but human doers. The overriding message is that when I’m not “doing”, I’m nothing.
