Procrastinate Tomorrow: 5 Ways To Push Through
For many of us, procrastination feels like the bane of our existence.
It’s the voice saying, “I know I should be…,” the project you just don’t have time for, or the dream going unfulfilled.
I used to procrastinate with everything. I’d drag my feet, wait until the last minute, freak out and then just before the deadline, get it done. But after awhile, I realized that my pattern was causing me so much stress. I hated feeling the pressure and tension.
That’s when I decided to make some adjustments in how I approached my life. And here’s what I found most useful:
For many of us, procrastination feels like the bane of our existence.
It’s the voice saying, “I know I should be…,” the project you just don’t have time for, or the dream going unfulfilled.
I used to procrastinate with everything. I’d drag my feet, wait until the last minute, freak out and then just before the deadline, get it done. But after awhile, I realized that my pattern was causing so much stress. I hated feeling the pressure and tension.
That’s when I decided to make some adjustments in how I approached my life. And here’s what I found most useful:
1. Just Start
What you’re dealing with is the mind, your own resistance to taking action.
Be gentle with yourself. Suggest that you do one thing, one small act: an email, a blog post, a phone call, a walk around the park, reading 10 pages of your assignment.
Do one thing to get you started.
For whatever reason, the mind is fearful- fear of change, of growing, of an unknown. And the best way to deal with fear is to take action.
When you don’t take action, you’re stuck in the loop.
The mind is always saying, “you know you should be reading, researching, walking…” You ignore the voice and watch TV, eat chips, do the crossword puzzle. But it’s still there, like a broken record.
I was most chronic with this about exercising. And one day my Dad said to me, “You’d have been done hours ago if you’d just gone for a run. Think of all the time and energy you’ve wasted thinking about it.”
Stop thinking about what to do and take action.
2. Small Pieces
Sometimes a project can seem or feel overwhelming. It’s a massive undertaking. Something you’ve never done before. Where do you start?
Break it down into steps or pieces.
Think about your project as stepping stones. What is the first thing that needs to get done? And the second?
When we put things into bite size pieces, it suddenly doesn’t feel as overwhelming or huge.
Now it’s manageable.
I took a writing class recently and the instructor was talking about completing a manuscript, which, as you can imagine, consists of many chapters. (and chapters are comprised of scenes.) She suggested you write the titles of every scene on scraps of paper, cut them up and throw them into a jar. Then when you’re ready to sit down and write, you pull one of your pieces of paper out of the jar and write that scene.
Talk about bite size pieces!
3. Schedule Time
There’s a huge project on your horizon. You’ve decided to break it into small pieces. Now make sure that you schedule it out.
Plot out over time exactly when you're going to do each piece.
When I was completing my Master’s program in Social Work, I was taking care of my family and had a full time job so time was tight. The only way I was able to manage the workload was to create a schedule.
At the beginning of the semester, I reviewed everything I was required to do: tests, papers, presentations, and then I scheduled them – when I would work on each one - which days, which projects.
And then I did it.
Some days I definitely did not want to, but it was what I had to do in order to stay sane and complete all the work.
4. Ask For Help
A number of years ago, I was tasked with accrediting the school my husband and I founded. That process required clearly communicating all of the school’s operating procedures and processes through writing and massive documentation.
I had never done a project like that. It was enormous and felt totally overwhelming.
I created a timeline and broke down each part so I knew exactly what I had to do by a certain date. But even then I watched myself delay.
That’s’ when I realized I needed help. I needed to understand exactly how to complete the accreditation paperwork. So I went and received professional training which I was able to do for free!
Getting the help you need can be key.
What do you feel like you don’t know? Who can help you?
5. Create Space
Where is your special spot for work, exercise, creativity?
Overcoming procrastination is about creating healthy habits and one of the easiest ways to do that is to have a designated space. When you go to this specific place, you’re ready to work, play, draw or run.
I know a woman who always carries her gym bag in her car. That way she has no excuse for not going to exercise after work. She creates the opportunity.
Clean off that desk, create a beautiful space for you to want to be in to get those exciting projects done!
As Robert Holden reminds us, “procrastinate tomorrow.”
Nowadays when I find myself not wanting to begin a project, I will actually say those words to myself and they help me get going. I pick one thing to start and before I know it, the entire day has flown by!
Let me know how it goes for you.
Which of the above do you think is most helpful? Leave me a comment below!
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Shift Your Life With Mantra
Feel like your life needs a shift?
Have you considered trying mantra?
A mantra is a word or phrase that, according to Yogic philosophy (Vedanta), has power. The story is that the ancient sages, (Rishi) could hear the vibrations of everything in nature and made these sounds into words and phrases known as mantra. Mantra is the literal creation of form from energy.
Feel like your life needs a shift?
Have you considered trying mantra?
A mantra is a word or phrase that, according to Yogic philosophy (Vedanta), has power.
The story is that the ancient sages, (Rishi) could hear the vibrations of everything in nature and made these sounds into words and phrases known as mantra.
Mantra is the literal creation of form from energy.
I’ve used mantra on and off. But the first one that I chose for myself was in 2000, when I moved to Florida. I decided to learn a long chant called the Hanuman Chalisa that an Indian friend of mine had been reading in Sanskrit.
The Hanuman Chalisa is 40 verses dedicated to the monkey God, Hanuman, the god of service and devotion. Purportedly, doing this mantra gives the practitioner Hanuman’s grace.
All those years ago, I sang that long song every day – initially for forty days in a row – but then kept going, memorizing it completely.
Excited by the results, I tried other ones.
But, to be honest, I hadn’t done mantra in a really long time, well, not until a few weeks ago.
I’d been sick and was ready for a shift, physically, energetically, emotionally. I needed to kick myself into a new space of action and clarity. And what better way to do that than to create sacred space with ritual?
I bought flowers, lit incense, offered some fruits and sweets and lit the candle on my altar. I rang the bell and called to the gods and goddesses, and then I did mantra.
The one I chose was to Laxmi, the goddess of prosperity. Om Shree Maha Laxmi, Namaha.
After I finished the mantra and my subsequent meditation, I realized I wanted to continue doing this mantra for forty days. We say forty days because that’s the approximate time it takes to change a habit.
If you’re ready to give mantra a try, here are the details.
1. Choose a word or phrase to repeat
2. A mantra can be given by a teacher and/or it can be chosen by a student
Think about what you would like in your life right now: strength, peace, clarity, insight.
Use your intuition to guide you to sources that might have a good selection.
Read through each mantra and it’s meaning before making a choice. Then try it for a few days and see how it feels.
3. The goal is to repeat the mantra for forty consecutive days
Mantra is said to gain power the more it is repeated.
4. Say it once a day or, if you like, choose a number of repetitions
Hindus traditionally do 108.
Repeating a mantra is just like doing rosary.
In Sanskrit, this is called Japa (to repeat). Normally practitioners use a Japa mala, the Hindu equivalent of a rosary. Hindu mala are made with either 27, 54 or 108 beads. It is customary to count mantra in sets of 108.
There are many reasons the number 108 is significant in Hinduism. It is said that there are 108 names for the Goddess. There are also 54 letters in the Sanskrit alphabet. (54 x 2 = 108) Apparently there are also 108 energy lines that cross our bodies, intersecting at our chakras and converging at the heart center.
If you decide to repeat your mantra, place the mala in your right hand and count each bead with your thumb as it slides over your index finger. The larger guru bead or meru (mountain) bead is where you begin (but don’t count it!) When you hit it again, you know you’ve done one round.
But remember, if you miss a day, start over again at day 1!
5. When you’re ready, find a comfortable place to sit.
Close your eyes.
If you choose, have your japa mala in your right hand.
Focus on correctly pronouncing the sound, word or phrase of your mantra silently or aloud.
If you don’t have a japa mala or feel daunted by this part, simply say your mantra once a day, or use your fingers and say it ten times. The point is to use mantra for clarity, invocation, and grounding.
You can use a Sanskrit one or say a word or phrase that resonates with you.
If you’re interested in a Sanskirt one, here is a short list:
- Om: (vibration of the universe, the word that means God, it has also been translated to mean: Everything; it is, will be, will become
- Shanti: Peace
- Om Tat Sat: – I am that; what is everlasting and unchanging is God
- Sat Nam: – Truth is my name; I recognize the divinity within you.
Give mantra a try and let me know how it goes!
Tell me which one you chose below!
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Feel It & Heal It: 5 Steps to Transform Pain
I was 15 years old the first time I consciously felt anxiety and had just started my sophomore year at a new boarding school. The souring in my stomach and the fear that blinded me was terrifying. So I bolted down the stairs of my dorm, and headed straight to the vending machines. I wanted to push away and bury all that anxiety and uncertainty.
By October, I’d gained twenty pounds because I didn’t know how to deal with dark emotions like: discomfort, anxiety, pain, anguish, frustration, resentment…
It took me 10 years to learn how to be present and experience these uncomfortable feelings.
Now when they come up, do I like it? Not really.
I was 15 years old the first time I consciously felt anxiety and had just started my sophomore year at a new boarding school. The souring in my stomach and the fear that blinded me was terrifying. So I bolted down the stairs of my dorm, and headed straight to the vending machines. I wanted to push away and bury all that anxiety and uncertainty.
By October, I’d gained twenty pounds because I didn’t know how to deal with dark emotions like: discomfort, anxiety, pain, anguish, frustration, resentment…
It took me 10 years to learn how to be present and experience these uncomfortable feelings.
Now when they come up, do I like it? Not really.
Is it fun? Absolutely not.
Is it worth it? Definitely.
And here’s why – because you can’t heal something unless you allow yourself to feel it.
If you're ready to open up and move through your own emotional pain, here's a road map:
1. Make Space
Be okay with whatever you’re feeling. Allow it to be in the room, to be in your body.
Instead of trying to push the uncomfortable feeling away, avoid it or, like I used to do, stuff it under food, allow it to exist. Rumi’s Guest House poem is the perfect reminder. In it, he describes himself as a guest house – opening the door and welcoming all visitors (his emotions)- whatever they may be, and inviting them in. Here’s a link to it.
2. Give Yourself Permission
It’s okay to have bad thoughts, cruel thoughts, unkind thoughts. We all do, we’re human! Give yourself permission to just feel what you feel. Mad at yourself or another, rage, vindictive.
When I was a girl, my mother used to say, “you’re not responsible for your feelings, only your actions.” Maybe at times I did want to kill my sister but I never actually did it.
3. Release Judgment
Part of why we don’t even allow ourselves to feel dark emotions, is because we immediately judge ourselves. The inner critic starts, “don’t think that” or “who are you to…” or “you shouldn’t feel angry about that because…”
Try allowing yourself to experience anger, hurt, jealousy without judging it – no inner critic, no running dialog. Just feel it and see where that takes you.
Do this without judging it or you.
4. Get Dirty
Once you make space for these dark emotions without judgment, the real work begins. Dig in. What is the source of the frustration? Hurt? Anxiety? What does it trigger or link to? See if you can find the root, because that is where the healing is.
As a teenager, my anxiety got triggered because I felt stupid, inadequate, not enough. Sometimes these same ghosts pop up when I try new things, take risks or new chances. Today, I sit with that feeling of inadequacy to see where it takes me. Usually it goes back to childhood where I can love the little girl and cherish her.
5. Let It Go
Once you’ve processed those uncomfortable feelings, you can release them. As we free up these internal spaces, we make room for more clarity, more energy, more focus and power. It’s like cleaning house, internally.
The real work of our lives is to be present with our own beings – when we feel elated and blissful as well as when we feel frightened and insecure. Allow it all to be. Experience the good and the bad, knowing that every moment offers insights and lessons. Heal and keep opening to life, to love and to you.
Life is a process requiring us to constantly open. Open to our own inner beings as much as anything else. Take some time to explore your triggers, the places where judgment and anxiety lie. What lessons are waiting there for you?
The work may not be “fun” but it is powerful and transformational and SO worth it.
Be sure to let me know how it goes - feel free to drop a message below!
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How To Be Fully Present
Have you ever wanted your moment – whatever was happening to be different?
When that occurs, how do you feel? Frustrated? Annoyed? Aggravated? Whatever the emotion, it’s a form of suffering.
For the past week, I’ve been exploring this idea – of wanting my moment to be other than it is - on a microcosmic level because I’ve been sick. And I was pissed about it.
I did not want to be sick.
Have you ever wanted your moment – whatever was happening to be different?
When that occurs, how do you feel? Frustrated? Annoyed? Aggravated? Whatever the emotion, it’s a form of suffering.
For the past week, I’ve been exploring this idea – of wanting my moment to be other than it is - on a microcosmic level because I’ve been sick. And I was pissed about it.
I did not want to be sick.
Instead, I wanted to jump back into work, hang out with my family, enjoy the emerging days and flowers of spring. But I couldn’t.
As I saw it, I had two choices. I could fight my illness, pretend I wasn’t sick and work while I felt terrible. Or I could surrender.
Surrender isn’t giving up.
It’s accepting what is.
It’s letting go of wanting the moment to be different.
So I surrendered to being sick. To not being able to enjoy the first sunny day we’d had in a week, to feeling like a bad mom because I couldn’t take my daughter shopping like I’d promised, to feeling frightened for our future as I watch our president potentially start a nuclear was with North Korea.
Surrendering isn’t giving up, it’s accepting what is.
As I explored this idea, I also realized that suffering is when we want the moment to be different that what it actually is.
You want to get to the meeting on time and instead are stuck in traffic so you feel... You regret the way you spoke to your significant other and it burns in your belly. You’re excited about all you’re gonna get done this week and then land in bed with an awful head cold. Well, no, that wasn’t you, that was me.
Just because I accept it and surrender to what is, it doesn’t mean I have to like it. And it doesn’t mean I can’t be pro-active.
But the reality is that sometimes life has other plans for us. We can fight them or we can allow them to happen.
I can’t see the larger picture. Maybe there is a reason that I had to lie in bed for a week. Maybe there’s a reason that our country has to experience polarization and pain. I don’t know.
But I can accept that it is what it is.
And then I can act.
I can take care of myself with vitamins, supplements, support and I can stay involved politically.
None of it works without a level of acceptance.
In a technique I use with my clients called, NET (neuro emotional technique), we often talk about being okay with something. “I’m okay having breast cancer. I’m okay that my father died. I’m okay with the current political situation.”
Being okay doesn’t imply preference.
Obviously no one wants cancer. The idea behind the “okay” statement it is to neutralize any emotions you have around the issue so it doesn’t cause you stress. So you can move forward without so much emotional baggage attached to it.
Surrendering is exactly that – it’s being okay with whatever life throws at you. Releasing the frustration, irritation, annoyance and getting on with life just as it is.
So what do you say? Are you ready to let go?
Share your thoughts with me, below the blog. I'd love to hear them!
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Ready to Speak Your Truth? 4 Reasons Why It’s Time
Today more than ever it seems like we’re struggling with this idea of truth. We’re being bombarded with talk about real news, fake news, and it begs the question, what is truth?
Truth is fact, truth is honesty, and in personal life, truth is the willingness to put what you say and believe on the line.
Are you motivated to be more truthful with your loved ones?
Here are 4 reasons why it’s time for you to speak your truth.
Today more than ever it seems like we’re struggling with this idea of truth. We’re being bombarded with talk about real news, fake news, and it begs the question, what is truth?
Truth is fact, truth is honesty, and in personal life, truth is the willingness to put what you say and believe on the line.
Are you motivated to be more truthful with your loved ones?
Here are 4 reasons why it’s time for you to speak your truth.
1. Take Your Power
As women it can be hard to stand in your power. Many of us were trained to be gentle peacekeepers. And oftentimes when women do stand up, they’re branded as “bitches.”
Of course there’s another way – to bring the heart of compassion into what we say. Think about your chakras. The chakra of power is in your belly, as you move up, the next one is at your heart center, and then your 5th chakra is your throat.
The goal is to speak your truth – moving that idea or power up from the belly – through the heart and out the throat.
There’s a world of difference between someone communicating from this space as opposed to bypassing the heart and speaking truth from a place of power.
Think about people you’ve heard talk – politicians, motivational speakers, reporters. When you listen to those voices, what do you hear? Clarity and compassion or harsh aggressive, bombastic truth?
2. Be in Integrity
When we are true to ourselves, we are in integrity.
What is integrity?
One definition, according to the American Heritage Dictionary is, “the quality or condition of being whole.”
I think about integrity as alignment. I want my actions and my words to align with my thoughts and beliefs as much as I am able to do that.
So when we choke back words or don’t speak authentically, we fall out of integrity.
How can you say the words that need to be said today?
3. Forgive
Speaking your truth allows you to forgive and I believe that forgiveness is one of our primary functions on earth.
Forgiveness is an act of release – both for you and the “other.”
When we speak to someone about what we really think, how we genuinely feel, we are opening a door through which true conversation, healing and love can occur.
This is the power of forgiveness.
4. Help Others
Are you one of those people who has the ability to see exactly what’s happening? As if you can cut through to the core of something and genuinely understand an issue?
Whether it’s a business challenge or a personal one, you sense which way to go or how it should be navigated – for the right outcome.
But then, you don’t say anything.
Maybe you stay quiet because you feel like it isn’t your place to share. Or perhaps you think it’s presumptive to offer your opinion. Maybe you don’t want to hurt someone else’s feelings.
But here’s the thing, by not speaking up, you are denying that person your authentic voice, your clarity, your insight.
Think back to when a friend spoke truth to you. Maybe in the moment it wasn’t fun or you didn’t like it, but did it help? Did those words prompt action from you?
I remember the first time I got advice like this as a young adult. I was living in Hong Kong and had finally quit a job I really hated. In all honesty, I just wanted to run away from everything – the city, my failed existence, even myself.
One day I was picnicking with my best friend. We’d traveled to an outlying island and hiked up a canyon following a trickle of a waterfall. From there, we could see across the harbor to Hong Kong island with its towering skyscrapers. She turned to me and said; “What are you going to do now?”
I replied, “I don’t know, anything, as long as it isn’t here.”
Then she asked; “Where are you going to go?”
And I answered, “anywhere as long as it isn’t here.”
She looked me straight in the eye and said, “you have to make your happiness here.”
Immediately I wanted to tell her to f**k off but I also knew she was absolutely right.
What did I do?
I did what she suggested. I stayed, made peace with the city and my life, and grew up.
I still remember her honest words nearly thirty years later, that’s the impact they had. What if she’d been afraid to speak? It would have been a huge disservice to me.
Hard conversations are hard but they're also important.
Whether they are with loved ones or colleagues, speak your truth. Say what you feel, what you need and what you see. All of us need feedback even when we don’t want to hear it. But that feedback when given with love, kindness and compassion can be invaluable and life changing.
Let me know how it goes! Leave your truth below!
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4 Simple Ways to Deal with Conflict
Some people love to argue and fight. Part of me is in awe of these gutsy folks because I am the opposite. I hate arguing. I don’t even like watching other people fight.
Instead, my typical response was always one of three things: I avoided the confrontation or I worked hard at making peace, smoothing things over or acting like it was no big deal.
But as I moved more into being authentic, none of these behaviors felt genuine. They were just ways that I was ignoring myself, allowing myself to be quieted or swallowing how I really felt. And then, when I ran a business, I had no choice because conflict was in my face.
It was time to deal with it.
Some people love to argue and fight. Part of me is in awe of these gutsy folks because I am the opposite. I hate arguing. I don’t even like watching other people fight.
Instead, my typical response was always one of three things: I avoided the confrontation or I worked hard at making peace, smoothing things over or acting like it was no big deal.
But as I moved more into being authentic, none of these behaviors felt genuine. They were just ways that I was ignoring myself, allowing myself to be quieted or swallowing how I really felt. And then, when I ran a business, I had no choice because conflict was in my face.
It was time to deal with it.
With guidance from co-workers and coaches, and years of practice, here’s what I’ve learned.
1. Think Before You Talk
Not everyone has the ability to come up with a smart reply in an instant. So, instead of reliving the moment with all of your witty “should have said” remarks, move on.
Your time is better spent thinking about what you really want to say. Create an argument, a rationale about what you believe and why. Draw on facts, and examples to lend persuasion.
2. Keep Your Emotions in Check
Have you ever heard the expression, once you get angry, you’ve lost?
When you feel really passionate about something, whether you’ve been wronged or desperately want another person to see your point of view, it’s easy to get impassioned, heated, or intense.
But emotion doesn’t often work in your favor. Usually, as emotion escalates, the argument loses ground. In other words, it becomes easier for the person to ignore you or to discredit your ideas, chalking it all up to overreaction, melodrama or hysteria.
3. Show Up – Don’t Avoid
Trust me when I say it’s better to speak up, get it out and move on.
I’ve spent lots of time avoiding issues both in my personal life and in business. But it’s always the same. Nothing changes until we’re ready to show up. And often times, by not confronting an issue, it can actually get worse.
The next time you find yourself wanting to avoid a sensitive topic, check in. What will it take for you to talk to that co-worker? Or tell your mate that you need help with chores? Or confront your child about the state of his room?
4. Connect Within
Nowadays, when I find myself upset about something, the first thing I do is check in with me. Is this real? Do I have a legitimate reason to be upset or is this something I am not seeing clearly?
If my internal answer confirms that there is a problem, I then ask for guidance. How can I resolve this? What is my next step? What do I need to do?
I also use affirmation to support me during this time.
One of my favorites is something I adapted from Louise Hay and if I’m really upset or afraid, I’ll repeat it over and over again. “Out of this situation only good will come. I see this issue being resolved for the highest good of everyone involved. I am safe.”
It helps me stay brave, calms me down and has the benefit of really helping a situation shift!
Whether you like it or not, conflict is a part of life. And learning to deal with it from a place of the heart is key. It can transform your life as well as those around you.
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Super Bowl Insight To Achieve Your Dreams
I was never much of a football fan. I've always preferred art galleries and concerts.
In college I used to give my boyfriend a hard time for watching his beloved Bengals until one afternoon he said to me, “you don’t like football because you don’t even know what you’re looking at.”
Well, that got my attention.
Life then took me to Asia and I lost the little knowledge I had of football until recently.
I was never much of a football fan. I've always preferred art galleries and concerts.
In college I used to give my boyfriend a hard time for watching his beloved Bengals until one afternoon he said to me, “you don’t like football because you don’t even know what you’re looking at.”
Well, that got my attention.
Life then took me to Asia and I lost the little knowledge I had of football until recently.
I am now married to a Patriot fan. And let me tell you, I’ve learned a whole lot about football.
And so it was that he and I were sitting on the couch this past Sunday afternoon, knowing we were about to watch a tough game.
We’d seen the Falcons mow down the Green Bay Packers to clinch the NFC championship. Not only were the Falcons strong and disciplined, they had All Star players. And the Patriots?
Well, they’re the Patriots.
As the Falcons kept putting points on the board during the first half, I started to wonder how on earth the Patriots were gonna win. Nevertheless, I was still hopeful by halftime until the Falcons shut the Pats down and then scored. Now it was 28-3.
But here was the thing, the Patriots never stopped. So often in football, it seems like one team is spent and they quit trying. Not on Sunday night.
Days later, I’m still in shock that the Patriots pulled off the greatest comeback in Super Bowl history. My husband and I have watched the replays three times and I keep scratching my head. How the hell did they do it?
As I watched the plays, I kept having this nagging feeling that there was a life lesson in here for me, which slowly began to coalesce.
Here’s what I realized:
1. Failure was Never an Option
It seemed that no matter how far the Patriots were down, it didn’t matter.
The only way to not succumb to failure thinking is mindset – the belief that you can – no matter what.
That means ignoring the negative thoughts in your head as well as being deaf to the naysayers around you. This is mind training at its very best and is 100% an inside job.
2. Perseverance
Perseverance is defined as “steady persistence in adhering to a course of action.” In other words, it’s when you keep trying even in the face of imminent failure. And 28-9 to start the 4th quarter sure seemed like imminent failure.
But perseverance is exactly what happened.
There was no giving up. The players had to be exhausted. Frustrated. Injured. But this Patriot team persevered. They played intense and hard – as did the Falcons. They stayed on course to the very last second.
3. Indomitable Spirit
In Tae Kwon Do, indomitable spirit is described as, “incapable of being overcome, subdued or vanquished, unconquerable.”
I can just guess that’s how the Falcons felt about the Patriots. They were warriors and they just wouldn’t quit. It was not only difficult but proved impossible to defeat them.
This trait, like mindset, is an inside job.
4. Self Control
Self control is about discipline.
It’s staying patient despite setbacks. It’s not giving in to frustration. It’s keeping your head and wits about you. It’s remaining focused, on task, and in the moment. Put simply, it’s doing “your job.”
That’s exactly what we saw in that 4th quarter over and over again. Bullet accuracy in passes, incredible catches, tough blocking.
Super Bowl LI was a remarkable game played by two incredible football teams. I am truly in awe of the extraordinary athleticism and determination I saw on Sunday night.
And the big takeaway for me is to remember what I witnessed and use it in my every day life.
So that when I’m faced with adversity or a tough situation, I can remind myself to lean on these four principles to help me achieve my goals, manifest my dreams and win this game called life!
Let me know what you think! Leave me a comment below!
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The Key to Creating Peace in This Troubled World
Last Saturday, after a day of sister marches in solidarity with the women’s march in Washington DC., I had the good fortune to hear Imam Jamal Rahman.
Jamal’s lecture was sponsored by our local Jewish temple as he is one of the three Interfaith Amigos. The other two are Rabbi Ted Falcon and Rev. Don Mackenzie. They formed a trio after 9/11 to spread a message of peace through interfaith dialogue. Together they have written three books and extensively tour the United States and Canada to share their message.
Jamal’s talk was infused with humor but his message was poignant.
My family and friends visiting Amantani Island in Peru.
Last Saturday, after a day of sister marches in solidarity with the women’s march in Washington DC., I had the good fortune to hear Imam Jamal Rahman.
Jamal’s lecture was sponsored by our local Jewish temple as he is one of the three Interfaith Amigos. The others are Rabbi Ted Falcon and Rev. Don Mackenzie.
They formed after 9/11 to spread a message of peace through interfaith dialogue. They have written three books and extensively tour the United States and Canada to share their message.
Jamal’s talk was infused with humor but his message was poignant.
He outlined exactly how we could reconnect, re-establish community and heal our divided country and world. And it was this: reach out to the other.
What does the other mean to you?
Think about yourself:
- Your ethnicity
- Race
- Cultural Background
- Sexual Orientation
- Religious Affiliation (or non)
- Political Persuasion
The other is something different from you.
It could be someone who has a different color skin, speaks another language, wears a headdress, sari, or sarong, eats meat, or is a strict vegan. A person whose sexual orientation is not the same as yours, or whose religion or political views differ from yours. It might be the homeless person you see everyday as you walk to work.
Jamal encouraged us to get to know this other person on a human level.
Because let’s face it. Underneath the thin layer that is our skin, we are all the same. As Toni Morrison says, we are one race, the human race.
If we can put aside our judgment or bias about what we think someone else may be like and instead reach out to him or her, we may just find we have more in common than we thought.
So who would that other be for you?
If you live in Israel and are Jewish, maybe it’s meeting someone who is Christian or Muslim.
If you live in India, can you talk to a street beggar or visit another house of worship?
If you live in the United States, see if you can reach out to a person in a marginalized group – a refugee, a homeless person, a family who is food insecure. Perhaps it’s time to visit your local synagogue, Baptist church or mosque. Maybe it’s starting a conversation with someone who voted for Donald Trump or Jill Stein.
The goal of this exercise is to get to know someone.
It isn’t to immediately launch into a political, religious or economic conversation. It is simply an act of acknowledgement. Of opening my heart to yours, in recognition that despite outward appearances, we are all one.
The only way to defeat hate is through love.
By building bridges across racial, cultural, ethnic and political divides, we can come together and remember that we are all part of one glorious family.
Isn’t it time?
I hope you’ve identified a person or persons that you're willing to reach out to. For me it’s getting more active with the homeless here in Seattle and meeting people who share a different political opinion than mine.
Take action, start a conversation. Fill your heart with kindness and non-judgment and see what happens!
And let me know how it goes! Leave a comment below.
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6 Easy Steps to Make your 2017 Vision Board
Ready to receive everything you desire?
Let the Universe know by making a vision board!
I just finished doing a vision board workshop over the weekend. Together, we cleared away what we no longer wanted from 2016 and opened the door to 2017.
Once we knew where we wanted to go, we set out to make boards!
If you missed my class, here is a brief explanation.
What is a Vision Board?
It’s a pictorial representation of your year, what you would like to manifest or be inspired by in the upcoming year.
Why do a Vision Board?
Ready to receive everything you desire?
Let the Universe know by making a vision board!
I just finished doing a vision board workshop over the weekend. Together, we cleared away what we no longer wanted from 2016 and opened the door to 2017.
Once we knew where we wanted to go, we set out to make boards!
If you missed my class, here is a brief explanation.
What is a Vision Board?
It’s a pictorial representation of your year, what you would like to manifest or be inspired by in the upcoming year.
Why do a Vision Board?
A vision board helps you to see exactly what you want to manifest for your year. We know that what we focus on expands so we always want to focus on what we want. A vision board helps that happen.
Ready to start? Here are the steps:
Step 1 – Get Clear
Spend some time making a list of goals and intentions for your year. Think about every aspect of life: career, health, finances, relationships, learning, creativity, spirituality and- don't forget- fun!
Most of all, think about how you want to feel this year – happy, expansive, clear, vibrant, positive, loving, grateful…
Step 2 - Get Your Supplies
Stop by the craft store and look for the following:
- Something Flat - poster board, foam board, cardboard or canvas panels
- Glue – the best one is Elmer’s Rubber Cement. It’s smelly but doesn’t buckle your paper or come off
- Scissors
- Images – Get a pile of magazines to thumb through. You can also use photographs that you have or grab online
- Words or Phrases (from magazines, online or stickers)
- Anything Else Fun – markers, stickers, glitter, ribbon, stencil lettering, craft paper
Step 3 - Rip & Cut
Cut out images, words, and phrases that speak to you and relate to your goals and intentions. Make a big pile. Then trim and neaten each piece up.
Step 4 – Lay Out
Take your words and images and begin to lay them out onto your board until you’re happy with the style and placement. The look and design is up to you and your creativity! Allow yourself to relax and let it flow.
Some people keep it really simple with their word for the year and a few images. Others (like me) tend to cover every square inch.
The look and feel is entirely up to you. Just remember to think holistically – and incorporate every aspect of your life – mind, body, emotion, spirit…
You may not use your entire pile of images and words. Feel free to save those for next year in a Ziploc bag.
Step 5 – Glue
When you’re happy with the layout, glue everything into place.
Step 6 – Placement
Find the PERFECT location in your home or office for your board. Somewhere you’ll see it all the time. I put mine on my desk where I look at it throughout the day.
Some people put it on their altars or sacred spaces. Others prefer the kitchen or bathroom!
Find the place that’s right for you – somewhere you can see it everyday.
This is your opportunity to have fun and manifest your dreams in 2017!
When you’re done, post your boards below or on my Facebook page so I can see them!
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What’s Your Word for 2017?
It’s almost New Year’s Eve.
Nearly 2017.
Ready for to start this new year?
One of the best ways to get clarity is to choose a word, 1 word to focus on, to dive into. One word to be your theme for the year.
It’s almost New Year’s Eve.
Nearly 2017.
Ready to start this new year?
One of the best ways to get clarity is to choose a word, ONE word to focus on, to dive into.
ONE word to be your theme for the year.
In 2016, I chose receive.
I’ve spent the last 12 months really exploring what receive means to me. Some of the questions that I asked were:
- How do I allow myself to receive?
- Where am I limiting that?
- How do I experience opening up to receiving in my body, mind...
This inquiry taught me a lot about myself. About where I hold back, where I get stuck, where I feel afraid.
Through a deeper relationship with this word, receive, it's helped me open up more, relax more and allow myself to feel safe, comfortable and happy to let in all the abundance, happiness, opportunities and change that has come my way this year.
And now it’s time for me to choose a new word!
Here are 3 Ways to Help You Tune into Your Word for 2017
1. Ask
Get quiet and simply ask. What is my word for 2017? Is there something I could benefit from focusing on?
Here is a list of some of the words my students have chosen in the past: bold, trust, faith, love, dream. balance, speak, mindfulness, pause, deliberate.
2. Use A Book
If you’ve asked and nothing has come to you, you can always try this cool trick.
Grab a book, any book, off the shelf and close your eyes. Think about your word for the year and then randomly open the book. See where your eye lands and what it reveals.
3. Meditate on it
Once a word comes to you, try it on. Settle into the energy of that word.
- How does it feel?
- Is there an opportunity for learning and growth?
- Is this where you need to go in 2017?
If the answers feel affirming then you’re on the right track. Don’t be dismayed if you feel scared. That’s often a pre-requisite to change.
My husband often tells me that if he feels afraid, he knows he’s onto something!
Have fun with this and share your word with me! Simply type it in below.
If you’re ready to dive in more, download my free vision worksheet to really jump start your year! Click HERE
Here’s to an amazing, wonderful 2017!
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Manifest Your Holiday Miracle
The other morning I turned the page for my new lesson in A Course in Miracles (ACIM) and here is what it said; “I am entitled to miracles.”
I smiled.
First because I love that idea, and second because it felt so timely, given that Christmas and Chanukah are right around the corner.
I’ve always been fascinated with miracles, magic and what seemed like “other-worldly stuff.” To me, miracles were the foray of Gods, of holy people, of wonder. They weren’t something that a mere mortal such as myself could perform.
Until I learned more - that we, you and I, co-create our world with God.
The other morning I turned the page for my new lesson in A Course in Miracles (ACIM) and here is what it said; “I am entitled to miracles.”
I smiled.
First because I love that idea, and second because it felt so timely, given that Christmas and Chanukah are right around the corner.
I’ve always been fascinated with miracles, magic and what seemed like “other-worldly stuff.” To me, miracles were the foray of Gods, of holy people, of wonder. They weren’t something that a mere mortal such as myself could perform.
Until I learned more - that we, you and I, co-create our world with God.
One thing that I really appreciate about A Course in Miracles it that it’s like a handbook for how to do that. In fact, on page 3 it details 50 principles to describe a miracle!
Here Are my Top 10 Definitions of a Miracle
1. There is no order of difficulty in miracles.
One is not "harder" or "bigger" than another. They are all the same. All expressions of love are maximal.
2. Miracles occur naturally as expressions of love.
The real miracle is the love that inspires them. In this sense everything that comes from love is a miracle.
3. Prayer is the medium of miracles.
It is a means of communication of the created with the Creator. Through prayer love is received, and through miracles love is expressed.
4. Miracles are both beginnings and endings, and so they alter the temporal order.
They are always affirmation of rebirth, which seem to go back but really go forward. They undo the past in the present, and thus release the future.
5. Miracles are teaching devices for demonstrating it it as blessed to give as to receive.
They simultaneously increase the strength of the giver and supply strength to the receiver.
6. A miracle is a service.
It is the maximal service you can render to another. It is a way of loving your neighbor as yourself. You recognize your own and your neighbor's worth simultaneously.
7. Miracles reawaken the awareness that the spirit, not the body, is the altar of truth.
This is the recognition that leads to the healing power of the miracle.
8. Miracles are natural signs of forgiveness.
Through miracles you accept God's forgiveness by extending it to others.
9. The miracle acknowledges everyone as your brother and mine.
It is a way of perceiving the universal mark of God.
10. The miracle is a learning device that lessens the need for time.
It establishes an out-of-pattern time interval not under the usual laws of time. In this sense it is timeless.
As we head into the holidays, think about Jesus as an example of one who recognized his own divinity.
Why not embrace your own ability to manifest miracles?
Be love, share love and open up to the wonderment of life this season.
Use prayer to set intention and visualize perfect healing, manifestation or whatever it is that your life needs.
You can do this – it is your nature and right. And as we are taught in ACIM, “Miracles are natural. When they do not occur, something has gone wrong."
So get to work!
Don’t forget to let me know how it goes – share your miracles with me.
Leave a comment below.
Feeling the love? Join our growing tribe today!
5 Tips for A Stress-Free Holiday Season
We’re entering into the vortex of holiday. The next 5 weeks will be a blur of excitement… and stress.
Many of us look forward to the holidays as a time for family, fun, sharing and giving. But the holidays are THE most stressful time of year.
So in the midst of decorating, shopping, cooking and partying, be sure to take extra special care of YOU.
Here are my top 5 ways to stay sane and enjoy this most wonderful time of year.
We’re entering into the vortex of holiday. The next 5 weeks will be a blur of excitement… and stress.
Many of us look forward to the holidays as a time for family, fun, sharing and giving. But the holidays are THE most stressful time of year.
So in the midst of decorating, shopping, cooking and partying, be sure to take extra special care of YOU.
Here are my top 5 ways to stay sane and enjoy this most wonderful time of year.
1. Start Your Day
How you start your day is critical.
For years my husband would say, “How you start your day is how you live your day.”
He and I always start with meditation. Why? Because it offers a moment of silence, of unity and a way to ground and center myself before I jump into the chaos of life.
Give yourself the gift of silence in the morning.
If you’re not ready for that, listen to a guided meditation. I have many on my website. Feel free to download some today. Click Here
2. Schedule Timeouts
Timeouts aren’t just for toddlers anymore. Timeouts are for adults, especially Mommies and Daddies who need a little down time, relaxation and rest.
But the key is to schedule them.
I know this sounds counter intuitive – but if they aren’t scheduled, life will intercede. Here are the steps to making your timeouts a reality:
- Ask yourself: What time during the day is good for even a 20-minute time to chill? Around lunch time? During that 3pm drag? A half hour before bedtime?
- Now think about what day or days of the week this could work.
Maybe Wednesdays the kids don’t need to get picked up until 4 so you could have an hour to put your feet up and read a magazine. Or Friday is a half day at work, you could do something in the afternoon...
SCHEDULE these breaks into your life.
Think of them as catnaps OR take an entire afternoon and get a massage, relax in the hot tub or simply unwind on a nature walk.
3. Delegate / Ask for Help
Even when we look forward to the holidays, they can easily feel overwhelming.
Because in addition to the regular schedule – job, children, family, chores, school – there’s the added decorating, gift buying, socializing…
How can you manage it all?
- Make a list of all the new chores and obligations/invitations that the holidays bring.
- Prioritize the list. What can other people do?
- Enlist help from friends and family members including children – regardless of age. They love to assist and it’s fun for them to be involved.
I know a woman who confessed to being such a control freak she wouldn’t let anyone help her put the lights on the Christmas tree.
Know yourself and decide what the MUSTS are for you, then give away the other tasks. (Even if it means they don’t get done absolutely perfectly.)
4. Stick to the Budget
I know this one isn’t romantic but it’s a vital anti-stress tool.
Overspending for the holidays can fell good for a fleeting moment but ultimately it adds undue pressure and stress.
To avoid this, make yourself a budget.
How much available cash do you have for gifts?
Be realistic.
Once you identify that, allocate a certain amount per person. If you have specific presents in mind, subtract those costs from your budget and then get creative with the rest.
There’s always enough money for everything you need to get.
5. Exercise
I recently finished an article that cited research about the incredible benefits to your brain of cardio exercise like running. It helps create new brain cells (wahoo!) It also benefits mitochondria which provides energy to the cells.
If you aren’t in the habit of exercising, the holidays are the perfect time to start.
You'll feel better in mind, body and spirit. It will lower your stress level and keep your neurons strong and healthy regardless of how much eggnog you imbibe!
Enjoy these next few weeks with friends and family. But be sure to take the best care of YOU!
Let me know how it goes – share your self care plan with me and leave a comment below!
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4 Ways to Choose Love in the Face of Uncertainty
Life is filled with the unknown. Whether it’s a presidential election, a storm prediction, a doctor’s appointment or the stock market.
In fact, life essentially is uncertainty in action.
Think about it. Whenever you try something new – a dance class, a restaurant, lunch with a new friend, a job opportunity – there’s risk. Simply because it is new, unknown or uncertain.
So, how do we, as students of spirituality learn to embrace that which is unknown and not fall into fear?
Life is filled with the unknown. Whether it’s a presidential election, a storm prediction, a doctor’s appointment or the stock market.
In fact, life essentially is uncertainty in action.
Think about it.
Whenever you try something new – a dance class, a restaurant, lunch with a new friend, a job opportunity – there’s risk. Simply because it is new, unknown or uncertain.
So, how do we, as students of spirituality learn to embrace that which is unknown and not fall into fear?
Especially when that fear is palpable and permeates everything.
This is one of the major challenges we face, walking into uncertainty or fear without leaving us cold hearted, apathetic or checked out.
Here are 4 ways to help you.
1. Live In The World But Not of The World
My teacher, Ma Jaya used to say this all the time.
But what does it mean?
I define it as being an active participant in the world, showing up to make a difference, willingly and voluntarily. And working at not having any expectations.
It’s also the recognition that we are here in a body, in this time and space, but it isn’t all there is.
There is a vast reality far larger than we can even imagine – Source, God, One-Ness, Brahmin, Dreaming…
Remembering that this earthly plain is not all there is helps create energetic distance so you don’t get sucked into the drama, the chaos of this world that circles all the time.
Instead, be in the world as a speaker of truth, a messenger of love and choose not to get pulled into the craziness that is ever present.
I often think of the novelist Tom Robbins. In his book, Even Cowgirls Get The Blues, he wrote, “and the world situation is, desperate as usual.”
I read this when I was in my early 20s and it stopped my daily news addiction. Unfortunately, it seems even more appropriate today!
2. Choose Love
We always have a choice to stay in the vibration of love or come from a place of fear.
What will you choose?
I recently read about a church in Indiana that was defaced with graffiti that said, “Heil Trump” and another of a tilted swastika. Instead of immediately painting over it, the minister opted to leave it.
As she said, “we believe that symbols are what you make of them. And if we decide to look at these symbols as hate and be angry and frustrated, we’re focusing on the wrong issue. And so we’ve decided to leave them up as symbols of hope, whereas if anybody in the surrounding area — or even country — sees these and knows that we were targeted because we’re inclusive and they need a safe space, then they know that Saint David’s is a safe space.”
Clearly Rev. Kelsey Hutto is choosing love.
3. Nothing Real Can Be Threatened
This is a line from the Introduction to A Course In Miracles. The whole text reads, "Nothing real can be threatened. Nothing unreal exists. Herein lies the peace of God."
I find this line especially helpful when I have fallen into fear.
When we experience fear, it’s always coming from our ego selves, the place where we feel separate and alone.
In those instances, I will often repeat this line over and over to myself like a mantra. It brings me back to what I know, that I am safe, that the world is protected and everything else is unreal.
As ACIM reminds us, there is only love or a call for love.
When we are in fear, our soul/God/Source/One-ness is giving us a call for love, to remember who we truly are, that we are not our egos, not the fear, that we are a part of God and love.
4. Do Your Spiritual Work – Strengthen Your Inner Compass
The best way to stay in a higher vibration is to have a daily practice.
What is yours?
Prayer, meditation, yoga, ecstatic dance?
It is imperative to take some time each day to connect in to God/Source/Love. Fill yourself back up, recline in the infinite bliss that is your refuge and sanctuary.
Make time everyday.
This is THE most important time of your day. Do this for your inner growth, your sanity and your ability to show up exactly how you want to – with love, compassion and light.
It is always in times of darkness when the light is needed the most.
Be that beacon and shine bright.
What will you do? Leave a comment below!
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3 Ways to Unleash Your Roar
For years I romanticized about being a martial artist. It was cool, powerful, magic. I loved the idea of defending myself with only my body as a weapon, hurtling through the air like Bruce Lee or Jackie Chan.
I finally got my wish in 2001 and signed up for Tae Kwon Do with my seven year-old daughter.
Slowly I learned kicks, blocks and forms.
Studying Tae Kwon Do reminded me of embarking on a new foreign language, only one that was mental and physical. It required me to use muscle memory, especially for the forms which I loved.
But I also had to fight.
For years I romanticized about being a martial artist. It was cool, powerful, magic.
I loved the idea of defending myself with only my body as a weapon, hurtling through the air like Bruce Lee or Jackie Chan.
I finally got my wish in 2001 and signed up for Tae Kwon Do with my seven year-old daughter.
Slowly I learned kicks, blocks and forms.
Studying Tae Kwon Do reminded me of embarking on a new foreign language, one that was mental AND physical. It required me to use muscle memory, especially for the forms, which I loved.
But I also had to fight.
One day I was paired with a gentle man, the father of two boys and a friend of mine. We bowed to one another and before I knew it, his padded fist landed a blow directly at my nose!
My head flew back as I recoiled in shock. The splintering static of pain shot through my face. His punch though had an effect. I rebounded and aggressively fought back.
Minutes later we were done.
I sat down, panting and watched the next round but as I did, the tears welled up behind my eyes and a gush of emotions wrenched through my body.
It took everything I had not to lose it. I kept taking deep breaths until my emotions were in check.
After practice, I asked, what happened?
All my life I’d been conditioned to be a peacemaker, to make no waves. I’d never been encouraged to fight, defend myself or even be assertive.
When Mike hit me, it activated that old victim place and I didn’t know how to respond. It brought me back to being twenty.
I'd been in Barcelona for spring break. My friend and I had impulsively decided to walk to the Joan Miró museum. We soon found ourselves in a semi-deserted park, a gang of teens following us. The next thing I knew, their leader was brandishing a knife. “Give me your money.” I shook my head and acted like I didn’t have any.
Then he grabbed me, his blade cut at my neck. I froze, peed my pants and sent a pleading look to the gardener hoping he’d save me. Instead, he watched impassively and did nothing.
My girl friend, however, screamed. Loud.
One of the gang member’s lunged at my thin cotton satchel. It ripped open and everything spilled onto the grass – my passport, money, key…
Sparring with Mike had forced a difference response. Fight. He pushed me to defend myself and through that I discovered how to access the place of power within me.
Last week I was at a retreat and one of the women shared an experience of watching her son at his Tae Kwon Do rank test. She observed the kids, all of whom had perfect form, did the kicks exactly right. But only some of them were able to break a board.
I knew exactly what she was talking about.
I told her about the Korean master who trained my instructors. He would say, “You have to go to crazy.”
In other words, you have to be willing to be all in, to hold nothing back, to fight as if your life is on the line.
And the only way to do that is to access that power within.
We all have it but in most of us, especially women, it can lay dormant.
Here are 3 Ways You Can Access that Power Within:
1. Shout it Out
One of the ways Tae Kwon Do helped me was by yelling. They call it a “kihap.”
Whenever you hit, punch, kick, you make this guttural cry.
Try it. Exhale hard from your abdomen and shout.
Let it go – all of it- the tension, fear, anxiety, anger…
It feels amazing.
2. Say No
So many times as women, we’re conditioned to play nice, be soft, small or docile. When you find yourself in a situation that feels uncomfortable in ANY way, say no.
~No, I don’t want you to come to my house.
~No, please stop texting me.
~No, I am not interested.
3. Listen Within
We always know what to do, say or how to act. We just don’t always listen.
I was always looking for approval, for conformation because I didn’t trust myself. Sound familiar?
And yet, I do know and I always have known. Just like you.
It’s time to trust yourself and YOUR knowing. When you feel unclear, check inside of you and ask for the answer. Pray for guidance, insight, clarity. It will always be given to you.
Don’t feel like you have to run out and sign up for martial arts to connect to your own inner strength and power. It’s an internal river wide and strong that’s available to you at any given moment. All you have to do is choose to connect with it.
Step into that power! Shine that gorgeous love bright and strong into the world.
I want to hear you roar!
Tell me what that's like for you! Leave me a comment right here!
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Move into Your New Life with Joy & Ease
In my blog a few weeks ago, I laid out the 3 steps for manifesting your vision – dreaming it, writing it out, speaking it into existence and allowing it to occur. (if you missed it, click here.)
As it begins to come to fruition, something curious happens.
Instead of being elated, you may feel scared, unsure or totally unsettled.
This is the moment when we can self-sabotage.
In my blog a few weeks ago, I laid out the 3 steps for manifesting your vision – dreaming it, writing it out, speaking it into existence and allowing it to occur. (if you missed it, click here.)
As it begins to come to fruition, something curious happens.
Instead of being elated, you may feel scared, unsure or totally unsettled.
This is the moment when we can self-sabotage.
It’s kind of ironic – to move toward creating exactly what you want only to be scared of it.
The first part (see above) was focused on manifesting externally – the new job, the healthy body, the intimate relationship.
Now you have to make the internal shifts in order to fully step in and maintain this new space and way of being. It’s time to up-level both within and without.
Here are 4 tips to help you actually live your dreams:
1. The Upper Limit Challenge
Gay Hendricks wrote about this concept in The Big Leap. In a nutshell, it’s when we get something we want – like a promotion, dream house, retirement- and then sabotage another area of our lives – pick a fight with the spouse, get sick. Because we can't take too much good.
Upper limit issues can also manifest in that sudden fear you feel after you landed your first $10k client or sold your initial $2M property and your stomach drops. Immediately the internal critic starts: “This is never gonna happen again. I can’t hold onto this, I’m gonna lose it all…”
That voice is a signal to you that you’ve hit the unconscious ceiling – your upper limit of success, of what you believe you deserve.
When this occurs, allow yourself to recognize it. Gently move to a place where you can open up and allow even more happiness, money, abundance, and love into your life. Use your spiritual practice to ground and support you. Additionally, ask yourself:
- Is there someone I have to forgive?
- Does an old belief need to get released?
We must release the old in order to make room for the new.
2. Give Yourself Time
When we push into the new and get what we've asked for, the expectation is that now everything is perfect.
It’s the fairy tale / happily ever after syndrome.
But the beginning is never the end!
Think about it.
You’ve just expanded yourself. Of course it feels strange and uncomfortable. It's natural to feel vulnerable or weird. Be patient with yourself as you settle into this new state.
Remember, it takes time to learn how to swim in this bigger pond! To navigate the ins and outs of the terrain and make friends with the new inhabitants. To learn how to live your fairy tale.
3. Expand Into The And
When we feel afraid because something is new or unfamiliar, we immediately want to contract back to what is safe.
Instead, see if you can allow yourself to stay open to possibility, networking opportunities, and new connections.
If you find yourself feeling small or wanting to run back to your old job, home, or neighborhood, recognize it for what it is, a normal response.
Instead of judging, honor your process and nourish yourself in ways that feed you – take a bath, go for a walk, have dinner with friends. Relax.
Then schedule something new at least once a week to help you expand and reach out.
4. Hold the Tension
The transition between moving from the old situation into the new is fraught with uncertainty and anxiety. Because these are feelings we typically never want to experience, we often push them away resulting in sabotaging behavior.
Instead, see if you can be okay not knowing everything, not having solved every challenge.
For in that space of the unknown lies the alchemy, the magic of total transformation.
It's there waiting for you. Waiting for you to fully step into this higher vibration, this new exciting, thrilling life that you’ve dreamed, visioned, and manifested.
Now it’s time to genuinely and wholeheartedly embrace it and live it.
You are SO up for this. Go for it!