Sometimes we don’t realize just how powerful we are. But the truth is that if you really want to change the world, it’s actually quite simple: tune into love.
This might sound simplistic but hear me out. In fact, let me give you an example of one thing I do, as well as the science behind it!
I live near the Puget Sound, a part of the Pacific Ocean that runs through western Washington state.
Whenever I’m near the water, I look out at it and say, “I love you ocean. I really, really love you. Thank you for providing food, shelter and oxygen for us and for so many creatures.”
Before you roll your eyes in disbelief, keep reading because there’s actual science behind my actions!
You know that expression, “wherever you go, there you are.”?
I was thinking about that the other morning.
If you’re like me, you want to world to be a better place, more loving, peaceful, sane.
But what if the real way to succeed at changing the world isn’t by going out and tangibly changing the politics, or environment but is all about changing yourself? In other words, changing your mind about the world.
This is what I think the above quote actually means.
Boundaries often get a bad rap, as if they’re not a good thing, as if they prevent us from genuine connection.
Is that really true?
First off, let’s define what we’re really talking about.
A boundary can be physical like a fence or a wall, even your skin is a natural physical boundary.
Boundaries can also be set by social or cultural standards. For example, in Japan, people greet one another with a bow, rather than in the United States where we often shake hands or hug.
Boundaries – in terms of dictating behavior- also differ in public versus private spaces, and vary depending on the types of relationship you have with someone.
When you were a child, did you have an imaginary friend? Someone you held tea parties with, read to in bed, played hide and seek with, or blamed for the mess in your room?
According to WebMD, around 65% of children under the age of seven have them, so if you did, you’re in the majority!
Naturally, there are social and emotional reasons that children have imaginary friends. It’s good company. It’s also a way to try out new social behaviors, or process feelings. An imaginary friend can offer support, too. After all, it’s YOUR special friend, someone who loves you, won’t leave, and doesn’t judge.
February is the month for lovers, for love, for reminding us of what our hearts yearn for.
Are you like me? Have you always been a romantic, from the time you were little?
I completely bought into the fantasy. You know it, right? Get rescued from your unhappy situation when you meet the love of your dreams, and live happily ever after.
As part this, I was HOOKED on the idea of falling in love even though I had NO idea of what love actually was.
I harbored this romantic dream for years.
We are in the midst of the Days of Awe as they are known to all of our Jewish brothers and sisters. This 10-day period commences with Rosh Hashanah and ends on Yom Kippur.
This is the Jewish New Year and as such is a deep time of reflection, a turning within, as we shed the old year and turn to look at the new.
Apart from the name of a well-known book and film, what does this actually mean?
We all have dreams and plans for how we want our life to be.
I'm sure you’ve laid in bed and fantasized about sailing the Caribbean, being married to your ideal partner, living in a ski in/ski out house on the mountain... having a passionate, full life.
Right?
Did you know that the breath is the single best way to connect your mind, body, and spirit?
In the ancient tradition of yoga, there is a practice called pranayama.
Prana is a Sanskrit word that means life force.
Yogi Bhajan said “Prana is the most powerful and most creative thing God ever created, because out of prana came life.”
Letting go of old, limiting beliefs gives you power. It frees you up to be exactly who you want to be and live your truth, your light and love.
As I was meditating, the words that came were, “as we release our samsara, we make room in our lives for the things we truly want.”
Samsara is a Sanskrit word that describes the cycle of life- from birth to death. This includes all the actions of our lives, the karma we accrue and bring forward into the next incarnation, etc.
I think about samsara, too, as the bodily goo that gets attached to us once we take form and become human. It’s the stuff- the emotions, relationships, duties, obligations, beliefs- that ground us in a physical form and ego.
I had a revelation the other day.
Our souls yearn to evolve and change, to up-level, to reach our goals and manifest our visions.
Right?
So we go for it and jump into the trenches. We start working and making things happen.
I experienced this last week. I realized that for the majority of this year, 2016, I have focused on closing my old life and making this transition across the country.
My life change has not only involved a physical move but also closing my coaching practice in Florida and transitioning clients, saying goodbye to friends (and family) I’ve had for over a decade, letting go of routines and habits, releasing an entire lifestyle and everything that was familiar.
When we decide to make a shift in our lives – be it a new job, relationship or home- there’s first the decision and then the doing.
A new job, relationship or home?
Once you decide, things start to fall in place, a To-Do list or path becomes clear.
And yet, as you move closer to the actual shift, the change itself, new resistance and difficulties arise.
Last month, a former student visited my husband at the K-8 school we founded in 2004. He came to catch up, say hi and share that he was moving to Chicago for college.
When he first showed up eight years ago, he was a scrawny 4th grader who couldn’t read. He also seemed hyperactive and had had some discipline issues at his previous school.
His adopted mother met with us and essentially begged us to “take care of her son.”
She was already on hospice and knew she only had a few more weeks to live. She was determined to find him a place where he could be loved.
I’d been flirting with the idea for 30 years but it just never happened.
And then I got scared.
Around the winter holidays, my daughter started bugging us to go skydiving as a family.
I reluctantly agreed and we scheduled to go in January. Our reservation repeatedly got canceled due to bad weather. My daughter returned to college and I was off the hook!
know I’m not alone in feeling despondent about the tragic and brutal murder of 49 innocent people on Sunday morning in Orlando.
For two days I was in denial about it. I just didn’t want to feel it, believe it was real. That someone could voluntarily harm innocent people right here in my own back yard.
And yet daily, the news is filled with stories like this. Of violence in every country, and city, affecting all walks of life.
So how, as sensitive, loving people, do we face tragedy and not shy away, give up or become hostile?
Study after study proves people who diet gain back all the weight they lost and often gain even more. Now even neuroscience is confirming this.
Diets are a form of deprivation that our brains respond to by thinking we are starving and then slowing our metabolism rates which is why we plateau and don’t lose more weight.
One of the best life lessons I ever learned was from Mike Dooley. He is the author of many inspirational books, published in 25 languages and offers a daily email service called Notes from the Universe which can be found on his website, TUT.com.
In these daily emails, Dooley is constantly reminding us that our only job is to focus on the what.
No, this isn’t an Abbott & Costello routine. I’m not about to ask who’s on first.
People often think if they forgive, then it excuses behavior or absolves someone. But that isn’t true. Forgiveness is not the same as forgetting
When I hold on to resentment, anger or a grievance, who is suffering? I am. Because I feel it. Maybe the person with whom I have a conflict isn’t even aware of how I feel. Perhaps s/he doesn’t even know they’ve slighted me.
Forgiveness is an act of generosity. You are willing to let go of a wrong, release a past hurt, release an unmet expectation.
Holding on to a grievance keeps us stuck in the past and feeling like a victim. Instead, if we come from a place of love, forgiveness can set us free, allows us to live in the present and opens us up to joy.
In 1997, I officially began a meditation practice.
At the time, I was receiving acupuncture for a physical condition and my practitioner and I soon became friends, sharing interests in film, politics and spirituality.
One day when speaking about a recent visit from the Dalai Lama, my acupuncturist friend looked at me and said, “you really need to meditate.”
I knew her words were meant as encouragement, but I was scared and quickly made an excuse. “I don’t have time.” I had a 3 year-old, a full time job and a long commute...
Since I was a girl, I’ve been obsessed with myths and legends, the hero’s journey and the fight between good and evil.
When I got into college, I discovered Carl Jung and his work on both the collective unconscious and archetypes.
Recently, I dove back into learning more about archetypes because I realized they play a huge roll in our lives. They influence us in seen and unseen ways and I wanted clarity about which ones were influencing me and how I could both recognize and harness them.
This inspired me to read Caroline Myss’ book, Sacred Contracts. In it, she shares that we all have 12 archetypes playing out in our lives. I think of them like guardians.
Last weekend I attended a memorial service for a woman I’d known for fifteen years. It’s a story you’ve all heard before. She was fine, couldn’t get rid of a cough, went to the doctor and received a stage IV cancer diagnosis.
As I sat in the crowd, surrounded by people who loved her, I was reminded of a memorial service I attended twenty years ago, when I had just begun my spiritual practice.
My brother’s best friend had hung himself. It was a tragedy and everyone was shocked. I happened to be in New York and was able to attend the service.
As I walked uptown to the venue, I was nervous. I’d known this young man well and was both shocked and saddened by the loss. What could I say to his family? Truth is, we’re all uncomfortable with death. We avoid thinking about it, looking at it, talking about it.
Then I heard my meditation teacher’s words echo as my feet hit the pavement. “We do spiritual work to deal with death.”
